I can't be a Little? (Completed)

Chapter 43

Turners pov:

I woke up feeling a paci in my mouth, I don't remember falling asleep. I slowly opened my eyes I blink a couple of times to get blurry vision away before looking around. I'm faced with bars all around. Spitting the paci out I shout "no no no no no!" While sitting up I could feel my heartbeat racing as I began to panic. I stand up with my legs gaping from my diaper that's tucked below my sleeper.

Standing i relised the bars are to tall for my height to climb over. I feel extra panicked now as I start to cry from frustration. 'I don't need a crib I'm big I won't fall out!' I kept saying over and over in my head. I felt warm and stuffy in my sleeper as I continued to sob hard, pulling at the snaps hard braking them open. I trash back to lie on the bed with my legs kicking out. "Let me out! Now!!" I scream at the top of my lungs between my crys. Finally I'm free of my sleep which is discard in the corner of the crib. I feel silly sitting there crying in just a diaper in a crib but I can't clasp the tabs to put it off.

I barely head footsteps in the hallway between my tears as my door gets pushed open "Awh what's wrong turner?" Ryan said approaching the crib "what - what's wrong?! You locked my in a cage!!! Is what's wrong! Let me outtttt" I fling myself back kicking my legs. I understand I prob look ridiculous trashing about in just my wet diaper. "Shhhh turner it's only a crib and you're required by law to have one. I know it's different and difficult to adjust to but no need to throw tantrums over it!, it's for your own safety, no more falls out of bed like last time! Why you strip your jammies off?" Ryan said making me quieten down a little feeling silly looking like I was having a tantrum. "Stupid law! Let me out now!" I shout slamming my hands on the mattress. "Turner we don't speak to each other like that!" Ryan said in a stern tone making me sigh. With tears streaming down my face I reluctantly said "please let me out" without looking to Ryan "thank you turner. Let's get you out and changed!" He said lowering the bars reaching in to pick me up. "Ah no away!!! I'm big! I can get out myself!" I said moving to the side looking down. It did look like a fair drop but I was committed to being independent.

I turned around and while holding on with my arms I let me feet hang down to the ground. I feel the panic rise in me again as I can't feel the ground I kick my legs a little as my arms start to feel tired holding on to the crib. I feel Ryan's large hand grab around my ribs and lower me down. "Nooooo" I said although slightly greatful not to be hanging. I'm placed standing on the floor noticing the cribs height off the ground. "See you could have hurt yourself turner you need help with some things" Ryan said as I glared up at him. I waddled over to the changing table "where's the pull ups!" I said surveying the shelves. "There put away" Ryan said walking up to me. "Why would you do that ! I don't need these!!!" I said pointing to my diaper. "Turner you need your diapers your soaked!, I know you want to be bigger bit your not you need to wear diapers you don't have control" my eyes water not wanting to accept the truth.

I sat down on the floor and just start sobbing. "Im made for more then this! I don't want to be little anymore! I want to be big and go to class again and party again! This isn't fair I didn't want this!" I said before a steady stream of tears fell down my cheeked quicker then I could wipe them. I could vaguely see Ryan sit on the floor in front of me stroking my bare legs. "I know T, non of us expected for you and lukie to be littles. It's not a bad thing it's just different then what you planned. Your still going to have an amazing life and I promise you that you'll settle into it and be safe and loved and happy" Ryan said as he reached over lifting me into his lap which I made a feeble attempt to stop. "I'm not happy when I'm big I always feel sad and depressed" I said sobbing truthfully into him. "Im sorry pumpkin, I'll try my very best to make you feel happy both in little and big spaces" Ryan said kissing my forehead while rocking me on his lap on the floor.

I give a little shiver feeling cold in the damp diaper and no clothes. "Can I change your diaper turner? Get you into something warm?" Ryan asked picking up on my shiver. "Okay" I said meekly. Feeling myself be hauled up and placed on the cold Matt. I closed my eyes, change's always felt to difficult when I feel big. I feel the taps be torn open with ease as the front flaps open, I feel a cool wet wipe begun to wipe all around the front. My ankles are held, lifting me up into the air as the wet diaper is removed and w wipe down of my bum before a clean one is placed under me and I'm lay back down with legs sprawled. My brain wonders as Ryan sprinkles baby powder over me. It's crazy how my once best friend is wiping me down around there like it's nothing. I feel the thick padding be pulling up spreading my legs wide as it's taped shut.

"What you wanting to wear T? Luke's gone down wearing his sleeper." Ryan said making me unsure. "He's probably little still, I wear big clothes!" I said not very convincing. "You don't have to be little to wear your sleeper, it's cosy but if you prefer we can put you in some soft joggers?" Ryan said making me just nod. He placed a white top over my head before pulling it down and snapping it shut round my diaper. "No this is babish!" I said lifting my head up, "shh turner this is just to stop your diaper sagging and keep you warm. Now here!" Ryan said feeding my feet into soft arm green joggers and the same colour crew neck hoodie. I looked down to see a small embroidered dinosaur on the left chest. Running my finger over it. "Sorry T, best I can do" I just nodded as he goes to pick me up as I hang onto him walking down stairs to the others in the living room.

"Hey turner! We're playing some mariokart are you wanting to play?" Troy said sitting on the floor beside Luke. Jacob is sitting with Ben on the couch behind them. I nodded kicking my legs to get down. I waddled over feeling the bulk between my legs, I sit down on the other side of Troy as he hands me a remote of my own. "You know how to play?" Troy said leaning down to me. I nodded softly, looking over to Luke at the other side of Troy. "Luke big?" I asked making eye contact with Luke who smiled blushing and nodding with his paci bobbing in his mouth. I feel a bit jealous of him having his paci in. " but he in sleeper and paci?" I said glancing over at Luke then up at Troy and turned back to the 3 on the couch. "Turner, you can still wear your little clothes and paci in big space. Your body's are still little even when your mind is big" Jacob said leaning forward. "Oh okay, sorry lukie" I said towards him for making him blush. "It okay, can we play now?" Luke said getting a nod from me.

Ryan's pov:

Sitting on the sofa with Ben and Jacob we watch the 3 play the games, the 2 littles co ordination on the controllers being slow bit Troy looked to be taking it easy on them. Troy won the 1st one game making the 2 littles whine. "Again again!" Turner screaming loudly. "Indoor voice T" I said softly. He just glanced back saying "sorry papa" turning back to him game. I feel warm inside at turner saying papa while big. Troy sets them up to play as a 2 player this time. Sitting back on the couch with us. We all sit watching there little fingers on there remotes. Luke was jumping ahead not surprisingly,he plays an unhealthy amount of video games before his classification. "Noooooooooo!!!" Turner shouted out as Luke crossed the line 1st his fingers went into mouth as he looked back with tears in his eyes. "Hey turner it's ok, it's just a game!" I said kneeling down pulling him into a hug. He leans into me as he softly crys, I turn to the boys whispering "can one of yous get a paci?" Ben nods jumping up walking out of the room. Luke pulling his out holding his hand out to me with it in it. "Awh thank you lukie but you keep that, good boy" Luke leaned back popping it back in.

Ben returned handing me the paci. "Hey T here take this" I said holding the paci to his lips. "But I still no little" he said sniffing wiping his eyes. "I know but remember what I said you can use your little things when you feel big. Lukie was big right lukie?" Luke nodded " and lukie is using his paci. So you can use your and big a big boy" "oh okay" turner said taking the paci in. I go to stand up "no papa stay" he said tugging on my finger. I sit on the floor pull T into my lap.

Luke look back to the couch "daddy? You come?" Making Jacob stand up sitting down pulling Luke into his lap. Me a Jacob hold the remotes looking at each other. Lukie speaks up "dada playing papa?" And giggled. Did did he just call me papa? "Yes papa play daddy!!" Turner said clapping his small hands! Me and Jacob just looked to each other smiling "ok then it's on!!" I said pulling the remote into position.

I won and tuner jumped in my lap "yaye go papa!!" I look over at Jacob "it's otay daddy!" While rubbing jacobs arm. I torn to look down at turner "now now turner it's not nice to gloat, lukie didn't run it in your face when he won and you were upset did he?" Turner juts looking down. "No papa" he said softly sucking his paci. "Good boy" I said leaning down kissing his forehead. Ben speaks up "soooo can we order pizza for dinner?" "Sure thing benny" troy said, making us all laugh, "hey fuck off!" Ben said lightly punching Troy's arm. "Heyyyyy Language!" Jacob said shielding lukies ears. "Sorry" Ben said blushing. "Ok go order some pizzas!" Troy said making Ben grab out his phone.