I can't be a Little? (Completed)

Chapter 47

Jacobs pov:

Just sit there listening to the surrounding noises and the soft sucking sound coming from Luke, relising the bottle is empty I fetch his paci out of the bag beside me, relising he's asleep I stand up walking to the car placing him inside buckling him in as he lay lifeless apart from the paci bobbing between his lips.

Pulling in home I carry him in quietly walking into the living room to the others. " how did he get on?" Ben asked looking up at us. I held my finger to my lips as I placed Luke down on the rocker bouncer turning it on to sway. Turning back to the others I say "Iv to try keep him regressed for a few days to a week, apparently they shouldn't be having 'big time' daily, it's why they can struggle to settle in. The doctor wanted to give him a drop shot to keep him down but I want to try naturally first, if you guys are willing to help?" I said looking at them all then down at turner that's sitting between Ryan and Troy. "You can't take away my big time! I don't have any issues! I like daily big!" He said slightly louder making Luke coo in his sleep. "T, keep your voice down, it's just what the doctor advised for yous ok" Ryan said stroking his small leg. "No I won't do it! You can't make me, i don't have an issue with being little! I like being able to go between the 2. This isn't fair on me why should it affect me!" Turner shouted as he slid off the couch running at the door but struggling to reach the handle leaving him trapped inside the room. He started to cry and sob loudly sitting down on the floor kicking his feet and slapping his hands on the floor, full tantrum mode. God how can they be so different but so alike I though to myself. Ryan got up and crouched at turner just shushing him letting him burn himself out.

I look back to see Luke's eyes flicker open with the commotion. "Hi baby boy, you try sleep again for daddy, turner just a little bit upset, your safe baby" I said stroking his cheeks, I could see his internal fight before his eyes glazed over, holding his hand up doing grabbing fists to be held. I sway bouncing him in my arms patting his padded butt look down at turner starting to tire out but still sobbing as Ryan places turner paci in his mouth as he picks him up mirroring my swaying motion.

"So I guess no nursery this week?" Ben asked in hush tones. "Nursy?" Turner looks up looking around the room at us all with shocked faces. I give a deadpan look at Ben, "sorry" he said looking down fiddling with his fingers. "Shhh T, we were just chatting about when we need some help with minding yous when we're at class, your going to be part of the decision" Ryan said trying to quieten him down. "Noooo I don't want to go, stay with papa!" Turner screamed. Luke started to fuss in my arms again. "Don't worry T it's not going to happen yet ok baby!" I said walking over to rub his back. I bring the fussing Lukie to sit down with him straddling my lap leaning into me. Gently stroking his back. His small fist closing and opening around my top.

I look over at Ryan holding turner in a similar position and then at Ben and Troy sitting on their own sofa, Troy stroking bens leg reassuring him for his slip up, Ben leaning in close to Troy before catching my eye sitting up straight. Hmm that was strange, I thought to myself.

Looking down I see Luke drifting off to sleep again before I transferred him back into his rocker switching it back on to a gentle sway. Turners eyes we're growing heavy as ye sat in Ryan's lap, every time he was just about asleep he would shake himself awake again. "It's ok turner go to sleep, we will all be here when you wake up pudding" Ryan said kissing turner's head. It wasn't long before he dropped off to sleep as he was placed on the couch with pillows surrounding him.

We watched tv low leveled for about 1.5 hours before I seen Luke starting to fuss and wiggle. Walking over I held my hand on his tummy rubbing it gently shushing him softly. His eyes flickered open, "ugh what time is is?" Luke asked looking around and then down at the rocker his cheeks turning pink. "It's 3 o clock baby, come on, come to daddy, how about we have a little play with your toys" I said lifting him out of his rocker, noticing he sounded big again, ultimately my plan was to get him to drop back in. "No thank you" was all he said as he put his head on my shoulders. I sighed sitting down putting Luke on my lap sideways facing Ryan, "hello lukie, peekaboo!" Ryan said hiding his eyes with his hands and then popped them out again. "Stop please!" Luke said whining while rolling his eyes. He's fighting with himself to be big. "Oh come on lukie, I know there's a little smile in there somewhere" Ryan said reaching he hands out tickling Luke's sides making him laugh as he tried to breathe and break free from my grip. "Fuck offfff!" Luke screams making us all stop surprised.

"Lukie that's no no language" I said trying to get him to look at me. "I don't care, this is cringey as fuck being treated like this in big space. I just want to chill!" Luke said trying to wiggle out of my lap. "Lukie ah ah, don't make me put you in time out, that's two naught words, you know we have to try keep you dropped otherwise you'll be getting the shot, and we don't want that! I know it feels cringey but we will be talking to you as if you were a little all the time for the moment to try keep you down" I said trying to not sound too mean. "I'm content right now, I don't want to play with toys! I don't want to play pikaboo I want to relax! I'll be little later on!" Luke said with a slightly raised voice.

I relise that I'm not getting through to him, I really wish he would just comply with this to be easier for everyone. I feel wrong forcing him to be little and treating him like a baby even when he's big, it feels wrong to do that to my best friend. "Ok my snuggle bug let's get you all comfy to chill" I said standing up with him and place him back into his rocker, clipping him in, I pulled the toy's dangling above him into his line of vision giving them a little tap to get them to rattle. "You be daddy's good boy won't you and play with your toys, I'll get paw patrol on the tv for you" I said after placing his paci in his mouth. I could tell he was getting angry with me and I felt bad.

Luke sat there with his arm crossed and eyes closed to avoid watching the tv and seeing his toys, "does daddy's little man still feel tired?" I said crouched down in front of him. Opening his eyes he spat his paci out "no I just want to watch something actually good and interesting". He said before holding eye contact. "Lukie you need to work with me here, we need to try keep you little!" I tried to reason with him. "I know I heard what the doctor said. I just want to be Luke, old Luke, hanging out with my friends. Non of this is fair on me." He said his eyes watered before he rubbed them away himself. I glanced up at the others, how can I argue with him, his right, non of this has been what he wants. "I'm sorry baby, I really am, you are still our friend you know that." I said as i unclipped him, "no I'm not, your my daddy, there your friends, like uncles, Their not my friends. Im the house baby, turners like my older brother. Im no body's friend" he had tears running down his cheeks but he wasn't making any crying noise.

I picked him up and held him close swayed. "Luke, just because the dynamics of our friend group has changed it doesn't mean that we arnt friends. We were always more then friends, we were the family that we got to choose. We love you"  I said before Luke started sobbing hi my arms turning his face into the crook of my neck. No amount of back patting and swaying was going to console him. He needed a good cry and all o could do was cuddle him. His crying woke turner up as he sat up rubbing his eyes. "What's wrong with lulu?" Turner asked Ryan as he walked over to him before sitting down pulling the little into his lap. "Lulu just having a bad time right now and just needs a good cry and cuddle, does my little turtle need a cuddle?" Ryan said looking down at the boy in his lap, I could tell by Ryan's face he was hopeful of getting a yes, he had a wide smile as turner nodded his head. We sat cuddling the boys for a while, Luke's crying settled down eventually. I motioned to Troy a sign for a bottle, I think Luke throat will need it after the crying.

He returned handing both me and Ryan the bottles. I offered it to Luke who said "nuh" turning his head away. From the way he said no I knew we were to far away from slipping, "you want to be a big boy and hold your own baba?" I said to which he looked up at me with his blotchy eyes and nodded taking the bottle. I situated him on my lap so he had his back leaning against my chest. Ryan adopted a similar position for turner who was drinking his warm milk. Troy put on Toy Story, not to babyish but not adult either, I give him a smile as to tell him good choice. "Here take this instead baby" I said to Luke swapping out his bottle for his paci. "Tank uuu dada" he replied snuggling down into me. I kiss the top of his head, he had dropped, i smiled at turner who looked to be in same state, giving Ryan I wink I turned back to wrap my arms around Luke holding him close to me.