Acceptance: Hogwarts Legacy Continued

Chapter 14: MC- doormat

Diana shifted uncomfortably in front of Sebastian's level gaze. She didn't know how many more of these confrontations she could handle. There was a reason she had chosen to keep all of her declarations inside of her for so long- she wasn't good at this kind of stuff.

She had a long time to self-reflect after Poppy had told her what she said, mostly to avoid thinking of the ever present grief she carried with her. She knew that holding in her feelings was something she had always done, there had never been someone in her life that she felt safe enough to fully share her troubles with. She didn't have parents, no family, and up until Hogwarts she didn't have any friends.

In the past any time she did let on to what was going on inside her head, her words were just used to hurt and abuse her. It had always been easier and more comfortable to just keep everything in. Her thoughts, her ideas, her feelings; they had led to her being ridiculed and ostracized in the orphanage where she grew up. No, it was much safer to keep them in, and let the tears out when she was alone, or to run away on the rare occasion she couldn't hold them in anymore. while in front of someone else.

When she came to Hogwarts though, she felt so drawn to these people who seemed to share their inner most thoughts with the world. People knew them for their passions and cares. It was people like Sebastian, who wore his desire to save his sister so evidently on his sleeve, there wasn't a single person in the castle who didn't know he'd do anything for her. And it was participating in that 'anything' that often led Diana to many unfortunate circumstances- ones that left her broken and bleeding, physically and mentally.

All these instances, wanting to be with these people she so dearly wanted to also be like- had left her worse than even when she was alone. It made her fearful to be around anyone anymore, but she knew deep down as well that solitude wouldn't benefit her anymore. So she had forgiven Poppy, Natty, and Garreth, in hopes that maybe there could be healing. But Sebastian.... She felt a pull of fear in her heart. He had hurt her more than the others, much more than all of them combined. And while no one had hurt her as much as the Keepers, she was very hesitant to allow Sebastian any room in her life.

And so she stood, unsure of what to say or do. She didn't know how to get these feelings out in the open in a way that Sebastian would understand, and that still helped her feel safe. Her experience navigating something this delicate was so lacking, it made this moment feel suffocating.

"Listen Sebastian I... I know... I know what I said that night probably hurt... I'm sorry if I hurt you. I don't actually remember any of it, but Poppy told me... anyway it's not how I would have chosen to share things with you, with anyone ever really. But the things I said, it's... it's how I feel. And I'm... I'm afraid that you're going to hurt me again..." The last of her sentence coming out in only a whisper. She faltered a little, as Sebastian's response came back much more fierce;

"I won't do that! I promise that I won't! I'm not going to put you in harm's way anymore! Not from any goblins or Ashwinders, and not myself."

Diana felt immobilized by him. She wanted to trust him, but the pain of everything that had happened with him felt very apparent as he stood in front of her with his deafening voice. But how could she just dismiss him when truly there was no one else there to fall back on. Diana had gone almost her whole life alone, and she wouldn't wish it on an enemy, let alone a friend. She let out a pent up breathe;

"I forgive you Sebastian..."

She shuddered as Sebastian wrapped his arms around her, squeezing so hard he could lift her off the ground. He dropped her back down and she shivered, but he didn't seem to notice as he cheered.

"I promise nothing like what you went through will ever happen again- thank you so much for staying with me!"

At this Diana couldn't help but smile.

After a moment he asked her if she wanted him to walk her back. Diana declined, stating she wanted to stay in the undercroft alone for a while before heading back into the hustle and bustle that was the Hufflepuff common room. Sebastian nodded, and said his goodbyes as he headed back out of the secret door into the rest of the castle.

Once the doors were closed Diana dropped down to her knees and held herself tight. Tears started to pool at her eyes, and she sniffled. She had given in to him, but she didn't feel relieved like she had talking to the others. What were her other options though? Things didn't really feel better, but at least it was over. And really as difficult as that was, it wasn't even the confrontation that she was dreading most.

Suddenly from across the room there was a cough and she jumped to her feet, wand immediately went out in defense. But instead of a spell hurdling her way she just heard a voice that made her face heat like she had been practicing confrigo again.