Primrose | REVIEW SHOP [ OPEN ]

✦ { Holly } Huodien (The Dragon's Ballad Book 1)

Client: fuzziwrites

Reviewer: lantea-

🌹》Title, Cover, & Blurb

The title is capitalized correctly and draws readers to the story. I'm not sure if it fits the story though; maybe that is revealed later in the story. The cover is very pretty! I like the art style and how all the characters are positioned on the cover. The font for the title is also cool and fits with the story. The subtitle and author's name are a little hard to read. The blurb introduces the story well and attracts readers to the story. The blurb could flow a little better though. Some of the sentences felt a little choppy. The first word in the second sentence of the second paragraph isn't capitalized.

🌹》Plot

The plot of the story is clear and easy to understand. It's interesting and draws readers into the story. The pacing is alright, some parts of it feel a little slow though. The second chapter was longer, however, the pacing of the chapter was well done. The exposition introduces the characters and their situations well. It needs to introduce the world in the story better though. There isn't much information given about the world. The aspects of their military training are explained well and are easy to understand.

🌹》Characters

The characters are introduced and described pretty well in the story. Some of the characters aren't described as much as others in the story. For example, the readers have a good idea of what Mudan looks like, but not a very good idea of what Chance looks like. The characters' personalities are shown very well throughout the chapters. You do an excellent job showing their personalities not only through their dialogue, but through their actions as well. The characters are all unique and the readers can definitely relate to them. I like how different the personalities are of the squad. It'll be interesting to see how they'll learn to work together.

🌹》Grammar/Spelling

There were a few spelling and grammar errors in the chapters. The most common grammar error I noticed was a word not being capitalized when it should be.

🌹》Writing Style

The writing style is consistent throughout the chapters. The writing style is well done, however, it could use some improvements. You do an excellent job describing the scenery your characters are in. It's very easy for the readers to picture the training facility as well as the area where they were doing patrol. As mentioned, more descriptions of the characters need to added though. The chapters were an appropriate length and the events flowed well. The phrasing was generally easy to understand, however, there were a few that were a little awkward. You do a good job working information and descriptions into the story.

🌹》Enjoyment

The story was enjoyable and I would read on. I'm interested in seeing how the story develops and I can't wait to see the dragons! Even though Merete is a pretty annoying character, I do hope she recovers though. I also would like to see how the squad develops and I hope they'll eventually be able to mesh and work together. I liked that you included pronunciation guides for the characters' names. It was very helpful!

🌹》Overall

Overall, the story was interesting and draws readers in, however, it could use a few improvements. The characters are intriguing and unique. Their personalities are shown well throughout the chapters. The interactions between the characters are also done well. The readers are interested in seeing how the squad will learn to work together. More descriptions of the characters could be added though. The pacing of the story is alright, however, be sure it's more consistent throughout the chapters. The descriptions of the scenery were very well done. It was easy to picture the training academy and the surrounding scenery. Good luck with your story!