Primrose | REVIEW SHOP [ OPEN ]

✦ { Kamila } His TeddyBear

Client: milkyzzzwayy

Reviewer: Kamila_DeRico

Title: 10/10

I love how you intertwined Oliver's Teddybear not only into the book cover but the title as well. It's unique to your plot as the bear itself appears in the book.

The title is short, relatively easy to remember and is connected to the plot of the book.

It doesn't only reflect Oliver's actual teddy bear but his personality as well. He's a cute, cheerful and optimistic person which in Jude's or the reader's eyes can be interpreted as him being a complete teddy bear.

Cover: 8/10

It is somewhat similar to the title as it shares the same idea; It's a teddy bear.

Furthermore, the font is bold and readable. However, the color dampens the readability a bit. The text also for the author's name is too small and cannot be read at all.

Also, although the font is bold, it may seem a bit too generic as it's a relatively popular and overused font. It's repeated throughout all the text on the cover, making it unexciting.

A little variety would do wonders.

Summary: 10/10

I really like your summary. It may be short but it does cover all aspects of what a good summary should cover.

It has the characters, the setup, conflict and stakes. It gives us just enough information to know what we're getting into by reading the book.

Plot: 10/10

The book has a simple plot. The romance between Jude and Oliver. It's short, uncomplicated and easy to grasp.

I love how you introduced themes that actually affect real life people into it, like Jude questioning his sexuality. I also like how you didn't sugarcoat Oliver's life as an homosexual—he faces challenges in his fictional world that he would if he crossed over to ours.

Not many books do this and I commend you for it.

Writing Style: 7/10

Your style of writing is pretty neat. It's engaging, readable and has a fairly consistent tone from start to finish.

There are, however, a few blunders I came across along the course of reading. The first being redundant sentences:

Casey scrunched his face. With his almost round face and a nose that got bigger as he scrunched his face more, he looked almost like a cartoon.

The word 'Face' is repeated too many times in a single paragraph—similar to the word 'Scrunched'. It's awkward and breaks the flow of the narration.

You could either rephrase the sentence in a way that the word is only used once or replace it with a word that is synonymous. Example:

Casey scrunched his face. With his almost round head and a nose that got bigger as he scrunched it more, he looked almost like a cartoon.

OR

Casey scrunched his face. He looked like a cartoon with an almost round head and a nose that seemed to get bigger every time he squeezed it.