Be My Shield

Chapter 32: It's Hard

A/n
Last Chapter now be really honest did y'all get the feels? Cause I even cried writing that. Comment and let me know.

I stayed in the bed not even wanting to eat. Even the thought of food made me sick as though I wanted to throw up. I faced away from the door but I cried my eyes out it hurt so much. He basically raised me After our father died. Jason wouldn't stop calling me but I haven't just been avoiding his call it's been almost everyone. I don't want to talk to anyone or do anything I just want to cry.

I heard a knock on the door it stopped for a minute and then I heard the door peer open.

"Pumpkin" I heard a British accent say, it was Paige.

"I know you're up" Paige said as I laid away from her as I felt the bed deepen.

"We miss you" I heard another voice say as another person entered by the sounds of it, it was A.J.

"We're here for you" A.J said as I got up.

Smackdown
I had a match tonight I tried to Stop crying during this match but my eyes were still blurry from the tears. I lost all my power I just couldn't and then I couldn't. I'm in a match against A.J and I already know I can't win this match. I got put into the black widow and I had to tap out I fell out onto the match I looked up at A.J as she looked at me, she was worried. I slid out the ring and grabbed my title moving to my boys as we walked backstage Renee tried to get an interview with me but I just pushed pass her. I changed out of my ring outfit because there were no more matches with us for the night. I grabbed my title and my bags and hopped in the back of the truck.

I put on my headphones and my jacket Hood and but my legs against by chest. The snow got harder as my tears came down more and more and a hand slipped in mine. I looked to see Jon he opened his arms and I went into them laying on his chest as he held me tightly as I cried more. I lost my hero, I lost my best friend, I lost my brother.

My phone vibrated and I looked at the caller ID, it was Jason. He's been calling me non stop and I don't need to talk to him. I eventually fell asleep on his chest as I cried myself to sleep with a tight grip on Dean's shirt. I need to Stop holding on to people tight, but holding on is all I know how to do.

I awoke in a bed and went to do my business in the bathroom. I changed my clothes and walked back to bed. I couldn't help but cry, cry and cry. I lost the most important person in my life and in the process I lost myself.

"Maya" Roman said walking in my room and I looked at him.

"You haven't been eating" Roman stated and I just looked at him with the same expression.

"You need to eat" he said sitting at the end of my bed and I never changed my expression.

"Come on princess" Roman peered and I shook my head as the tears pure out and he pulled me close to him.

No words were spoken but I felt how worried he was about me but my body couldn't, my emotions couldn't, my soul couldn't and I tried but couldn't.

1 month later

Seth's trying to make me take depression pills but I refuse.

"Maya" Roman said sternly. I haven't eaten in a month and I can't help it.

I tried I really did but as soon as I bite into something I just feel already full. I'm just glad that I don't look like I haven't been eating.

"Come on princess" Dean poked but I shook my head.

It was time for my match with Nikki Bella and I wasn't feeling to good and it's too late to back out. I walked out and my boys were going to standing ringside, but right now they were in the ting with me as Nikki cane out with Brie ringside. Nikki looked at the boys and smirked followed by Brie. My vision got blurry and the bell rang I was about to go for Nikki when I fell then I tried to get up but my footing went.