Beki, Beki, Bakit Tayo Gumawa?

Special Chapter 01-009

The reason why I can't leave Tiffel alone was this. She looked like she starved herself for days. Ni hindi ko nga alam kung paano niya na-manage yung ganito. I mean, what the hell, hindi niya ba alam na may ibang tao na nag-aalala para sa kanya?

Hindi niya ba alam na kahit naguguluhan ako kung ano ang meron sa kanya ay hindi ko pa din mapigilan ang pag-woworry sa kondisyon niya?

I've held her in my arms before and I swear she was not as bony as she is now. Parang lalong gumrabe yung pagpayat niya, ano bang ginagawa nito sa buhay niya? Can't she get at least a little grip on her life?

Wala akong choice, I need to take her home. Hindi ako papayag na hindi matatapos itong gabi na hindi siya nakakakain ng maayos. Screw the confession, screw the fact that I'm trying to get rid of her and screw the reason why I even thought of that. Hell, I'm pretty sure that I can balance her and Noel at the same time.

That doesn't mean that I am two-timing. Tiffel can be a little sister that I can watch over and Noel will always be my partner.

You know well that it's impossible to treat Tiffel that way. The subconscious part of me still bugs me and I wouldn't even bother. Wala namang masama if I try to treat them good with different intensity, right?

"Hoy Phil, saan mo ba ako dadalhin? Dahan dahan naman sa paghila sa akin, bumababa kasi tayo sa hagdan di ba? Paano pag nahulog ako?” Naguguluhang tanong ni Fel sa akin, hinihila ko kasi siya ngayon pababa ng hagdan para mabilis kaming makasakay sa kotse.

 “E di sasaluhin kita! Sus naman. Tsaka wag ka na matanong sumama ka nalang saken.” Maybe I must start to treat her better, saka na lang ako mag-iisip ulit kapag nakita kong nakakain na siya.

 “Ano ba kase yun?” She looked irritated and curious at the same time.

“Basta” Inalalayan ko na siya this time, nakakatakot na baka maaksidente pa siya ng kasama ko at konsensya ko pa.

She remained silent while we were walking towards the convenience store where I parked the car. Never in my life have I been intrigued regarding someone else's thoughts. Fel wasn't like this when we first met. She speaks out her mind, pero lately parang nakasarado na ang buong pagkatao niya sa amin.

I understand her grief but we - I can't stand seeing her like this.

Naka-andar na kami at lahat ay hindi pa din nagsasalita si Fel and damn it, I'm getting frustrated every single minute that I can't find a valuable topic to talk about.

“Teka, ang pagkakatanda ko may driver ka ah.” She randomly stated out of nowhere, thanking the heavens for giving her an idea that she's badly needed to talk right now.

"Ah yun ba? Nagpapadrive lang ako pag gumigimik kasi may tendency na umuwi ako ng lasing. So may naalala ka pala nung gabing yun ha? So nirape mo nga ako?” I tried to lighten up the mood by teasing her and much to my satisfaction, her eyes brighten up a little bit.

 “Magtigil ka! Naalala ko lang si kuya kasi naramdaman ko na may nagbuhat sakin papunta sa unit mo. Tsaka nakita ko yung likod mo nun habang binubuksan mo yung pintuan. Hindi ko nga nakita yung mukha mo buong gabi, di mo kasi binuksan yung ilaw. Nakita ko nalang nung kinaumagahan.” I can't help but laugh from her reactions. After a long time, naging animated na ulit ang facial expressions niya and boy, that made me feel good.

“I'm sorry, ok? Well, atleast di ba nagkakakilala tayo. Ikaw din kaya ang first kong babae kaya wag ka umangal na ikaw lang ang nawalan." My whole life, this will be one of the few chances that I can consider myself as undeniably stupid. Nanahimik na naman si Fel sa sudden confession ko. Hindi ko naman sinasadya to blurt out that fact.