Mr Hood (Calum Hood AU)

Part 57 - Get it all out

Calum and I had been sitting in his car for what seemed like hours but it was really just a few minutes. He has just poured out his feelings and I was taking it all in. It was what I had wanted for so long. But he needs to know what I've gone through. He needs to know what he is to me and I don't want to have to go through this in his car. I don't know how he'll take it or what will happen.

I turned to look at him and he was sitting silent. His eyes baring into my own, longing and anticipation behind them. I could tell. "Calum. I like you too." I said quietly. His eyes lit up and his mouth turned to a smile. "Let's go inside to talk." I told him and I finally opened my door. I got out and started walking to my front door. Calum followed after me.

We got inside and I went to the kitchen. I turned on the kettle to make him tea, knowing that he liked it. I got myself a bottle of water from the fridge and sat across from him at the counter. "Tea alright?" I asked him and he smiled. "Yeah." I couldn't get enough of that smile, it just made me feel better. Knowing that his smile could light up my world at this time.

I got his tea ready and handed it to him. I just stared at him as he stirred the tea around the mug. He looked so innocent. Such a normal thing but it made my heart ache with happiness. "Calum. I do like you. And because of that I need to tell you. Tell you about Elijah." I told him and he looked at me in confusion. "Okay? If that's what you want?" He asked concerned and I nodded with a smile.

I took a breath as I prepared myself. "Although I remember everything that happened with Elijah now. I didn't at the time. While I was there I couldn't remember anything. All I knew was him. I was transfixed with him, he was my world and it was all I knew. I got to know him, he let me know so much about him. More than anyone could ever understand. I am not in love with him. I know now that I never was, but he loved me. He told me this and it wasn't just part of some act, he really was. I lived my days with him and I enjoyed them mostly. But at night, at night my mind was focused somewhere else. With someone I thought was only a dream. I believed that Elijah was the only person I had but my dreams kept bringing me back to this other person that I had thought I'd imagined. I know now that it wasn't my imagination, it was my mind reminding me of someone that cared deeply for me and that I knew was the one I wanted to be with. The dreams were so simple. Just sitting and laughing, doing random things together and being truly happy." I told him, trying to explain it but it wasn't easy. "The man in my dreams, it was you Calum. You were the one thing I always had. The thought of you soothed me when I felt lonely, it made me feel safe in the end." I told him and he looked shocked as I spoke.

"I remember everything now. The memories from before, my time with you. When we had that silly water fight, the football practice, you saving me, talking about my parents, your YouTube videos and the kisses we shared. I knew when I started to get my memories back that they were powerful, that we were powerful. That's why I wanted to have to around all the time. At the hospital, you took care of me. I didn't realise why it was so painful for me when you left because I didn't remember everything. But it all came back when you were gone. I couldn't share them with anyone. They were driving me insane because I knew I was falling for you. Without you there I was in pain, the memories only hurt me more. And so I couldn't go through it anymore. I focused on Eli, the thoughts of him didn't hurt me like the ones of you did. Because I knew he could never be there for me after what happened, but you, you were still around." I relayed all I had been through. Tears were beginning to fall from my eyes as I watched Calum. He stayed quiet, allowing me to speak.

"You abandoned me when I needed you most, but I could never hold that against you. You make my heart ache, but it's soothing. It is an ache that I enjoy because I need that pain to remind me that I am here. You take my breath away with your smile and the little words you speak. You are the one that saved me. You're the one that brings me back to reality and takes the world away from me, all at the same time. I don't think anyone could ever make me feel the way you make me feel, Calum. I know that I'm falling for you, and I'm positive that it isn't a new thing either. I've been falling for you since you caught me." I admit everything. Every tiny thing that Calum does to me. Every little thing I feel about him. I want him to know. Because he deserves to know. It isn't some petty crush on my teacher. It is real.

Calum stays quiet for a while as he takes in everything I've said. I watch as his face turns from confusion into the biggest grin I've ever seen. He starts to laugh, more of a giggle, and it's the most adorable thing. He comes round to me and pulls me towards him. He looks at my face and wipes the tears away. "No need to cry, beautiful. I'm here now. And I'm never leaving you again." He says to me as he wraps his arms around me. I smile as I grab into the back of his shirt to pull him closer to me.

We stood there for five minutes just hugging, loving being in each other's arms again after so long. Our feelings are out in the open and we know now that we need this, we need each other.

"Summer, can I kiss you?" Calum asks after we pull away. I beam up at him. "Please do." He chuckles as I let out a little giggle. He cups my face in his large hands and moves in. Our lips connect and my eyes flutter closed. I feel the sparks in my veins, the butterflies in my stomach and the rush of blood going through my brain at his touch. It's been months. The memories of our kisses rush through my mind as he kisses me tenderly. He pulls away and I see the grin on his face along with the slight blush. I giggle as I peck his lips again.

"It's been too long." He stated. "Way too long." I agreed and he laughed. "I've missed you." He said. "The innocently happy Summer that would always giggle and blush around me." He added on. I blushed and smiled up at him. "I have a feeling you'll be seeing a lot more of her." I told him and he smirked. "I hope so." He chuckled and I smacked his chest. "Way to ruin a cute moment." I scolded him playfully. "It's us. There's going to be many more cute moments." He says boastfully and I chuckle. It's probably true. The man before me is pretty much a puppy. You don't get any cuter than him.

We sit and watch the TV for a while in the living room. It's some crime show and I am not really paying it much attention. I can't focus in my current state, wrapped up in Calum's arms, snuggling under a blanket. I'm in utter bliss and he kisses my temple again, a thing he's been doing every once in a while.

As happy and I am right now in this moment, I know that I can't escape what's happened. I'll never go back to who I was before Elijah, my innocence is gone and there is no way to get that back. Eli has been such a strong influence on me and who I've become, not all bad. I just don't know if Calum will ever understand that. I can't hate Elijah, it's not possible. I know him, well, I knew him. He wasn't all bad and that is something that I need to make Calum realise. But not right now, right now I am happy to be with him wrapped up in his arms. Calum makes me happy and that's all I am focusing on just now.

Hey guys! Hope you enjoyed this update.
Please vote and comment if you liked it. I've noticed the massive decline in votes and I really want to know if you guys are enjoying it. So let me know.
Thanks so much for reading this and for getting this far. Love you guys!x