Sacrifices ☆H.S☆

34

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-"how early?"- she asked happily.

I thought about what I had to do in the day.

-"like at two?"

-"ok"- she said.

I wanted to kiss her so bad, hug her, stay all day by her side but I couldn't. I just couldn't, not even look at her and not to feel awful with myself. I had to do something about it, change something in my mind, i couldn't let my mother control me and my life this easy, i couldn't let go of the few good things in my life just because of her. She doesn't even deserve it, and I know it, but I don't know how the fuck my brain works that makes me do shits like this.

I got in the car, started it and headed work. I was thinking how I would tell my mom all the truth, and how I would prepare my self for her reaction, when she called me.

-"hi sweety"- she said as soon as i picked up the phone. She sounded so happy and that made me feel amazing.

-"hi mom"- I said not so happy anyways.

-"I know it's early but i wanted to talk to you, listen, I was thinking that now that you are with mia-"

-"I am not with mia"

-"yes you are, and I think that is amazing, and i also think that, even tho I don't like that whore you have at home, it's not fair for her you know, so you should start with the divorce thing"

Right the divorce thing.

-"I told you I would think about it"

Tell her harry, just tell her!

-"what's so hard harry? Can't you just do something right for once?"

-"sorry... but it's not that easy"

-"why? You already started a relationship with the right person, you should do it right"

Help!

-"I haven't talk to davina yet"

-"for fuck's sake harry you're so stupid, you just have to do one thing, do it... you see how you get me? i was happy and you upset me"

-"sorry"

Yes I always upset her.

-"but mom I'm not sure about it"- I started, trying to say for once how I felt. I wish I had the same strength to say all that I said the last time I saw her but I just can't. -"I feel-"

-"You are doing the best for yourself, but you don't see it, because you can't get things easily, that must be the problem, you are so dumb to understand what's best for you"

-"yeah you're right"- I said. I didn't want to start with her. I was tired of hearing the same over and over, and even tho I wasn't going to do what she asked me to do, I didn't know how to tell her.

-"listen harry, you have to solve this before mia find out you're married, you screw everything up when you did that, I can't believe it, you could loose the one person that's good for you"

-"sorry"- i said again, I didn't even know why, i just knew i had to.

-"it's ok baby, I love you, I hope I can see you soon"

-"I love too mom"

-"don't you want to see me soon?"

-"of course"

-"great"- she said in the middle of a chuckle.   

-"but i have to go now mom, talk to you later"