Sing For Me

My Poor Darling

Ben's Point of view

I switch off the bedside lamp before lying down next to her holding her close, she was exhausted it had taken everything out of her to tell me. I had this ache in my heart for her, what kind of animal does that to a girl so sweet and to treat those two adorable little children like they were nothing, how could he have done this to her. There was part of me that was glad that he wasn't around because I would tear him apart if I came face to face with him.

I watched her breathing and looked at her face as she slept, she looked peaceful. This isn't how I imagined our evening to end but it made me feel warm inside to be so near to her, this was where I wanted to be.

I couldn't forget the look on her face as she spilled it all out to me, the fear, the shame, she told me everything that he had done to her, not just that night but others too, she was desperate for me to make it all alright, her confession had slotted everything into place why she was so shy, why she struggled with being touched and why she clearly wasn't ready for us to sleep together as much as I think deep down she would like to. But I could make this better for her I needed to win her trust in everything to make her realise that I was here for good that I wouldn't leave her or the children. I could be her shelter, all my life I wanted someone I could love and care for, Wendy never wanted that, my affection wasted.

I can't deny that I was shocked when she showed me her scars, it made me hate him even more. He couldn't have her so no one else would, that was his idea. It wasn't just a little burn either it covered so much of her, the pain she must have been in when he'd done it. The complete fucking bastard a cowardly one at that. This is why she was so self conscious at the swimming pool in case I'd see it, if she moved and exposed it from under her costume. My Poor darling.

I could feel myself drifting off, I kissed Lisa on the cheek and pulled her to me not wanting to let go, she was mine now. "Night night angel" I say to her

I wake after a few hours to find Lisa thrashing about next to me clearly upset " no no please no" she was shouting. I gently shake her she's having a nightmare

"Lisa, Lisa sweetheart it's alright I'm here".

"Please don't touch me don't hurt me please" she cries. I gently shake her once more as she wakes, she gasps when she sees me  and looks at me, I could see the fear in her eyes.

"It's OK darling it was just a dream" I hold her to my chest stroking her hair in a bid to calm her down as she just sobs her heart out practically screaming calling out in the dark "don't let him hurt me please don't let him hurt me" it's killing me to hear her desperate cries my poor darling.

"Hush darling, just relax its alright, it's alright, he can't get you baby I'm here" I say to her

"Oh Ben" she cried I could feel her tears against my bare chest, I lifted her up so she was sat in my lap

"Please don't cry, your safe, do you want to tell me about your dream?" I didn't want to force her but I had an idea already.

"It was him" she stuttered "sometimes I remember and it's so real that I can feel him, it frightens me". I feel her trembling, Jesus how can I take this away from her.

I see the tears in her eyes against the moonlight that shines through her window. She still trembles against me "it's alright baby it's alright" I whisper to her stroking her cheek not taking my eyes off her. Suddenly she looks at me, she needs me, she leans forward and kisses me, I feel her longing for me and suddenly its as if my whole body is on fire for her. She pulls herself to me, we are face to face with her legs wrapped around my back. I hold her at her hips and press her against me now allowing her to feel what she does to me how I physically respond to my overwhelming desire for her.

She moans against my lips her breathing erratic, I feel her breasts tighten under her pyjama top, "Oh Sweetheart" I whisper to her. "Don't leave me Ben please don't leave me" she says against my lips as I kiss her deeper, she wants me as much as I want her, I lay her down on the bed gently leaning over her as she keeps her arms linked around my neck. I can't help myself and I go to touch her but suddenly she freezes still  haunted, I can feel it. She pulls my hand away "Ben I can't, I really want to but I can't, I'm just not ready, please don't hate me, I'm so sorry" her words cause my eyes for brim with tears.

"Sweetheart I could never hate you, There's no rush really I'll wait for you however long it takes" she manages a tiny smile. "I know how much you want me, I can feel it and when you're ready we will make love and I will show you how amazing it can be. A tear rolls down her sweet cheek, I wipe it away and lie her down next to me. It's still early and I encourage her to rest