In The Darkest of Times (CaptainSwan)

Family Dinner

Emma's Pov

"So what exactly did you tell your parents?"

We were once again in my yellow bug. I was driving this time.

"I told them that I just wanted to have a family dinner, that's all."

"Really, your parents weren't suspicious at all."

"David takes any chance he's got to spend time with his girl and Mary Margaret actually suggested that we do it at their house. I guess they both are just trying to make up for lost time," my face shows no emotion as I revisit my lonely past, "I think they got Granny's," I say excitedly covering my sadness.

"Emma?"

"What?"

"You know. They try. They love you."

"I know. I didn't say anything."

"You didn't have to. But..."

"But, there is no but."

He gave me the face of 'I don't believe you.'

"I am telling the truth," I lie again, "I promise."

I can't have this conversation, not now. I will finally get over all the jealousy and anger someday, just maybe not just yet. I have come a long way from my Neverland days where I basically hated my parents, but I haven't come all the way around. I am still waiting for all the hurt to go away.

Sometimes I am jealous of my brother Neal and angry at my parents. He gets to live a life with parents and family who love him. He never has to feel lonely. He never had to hope that he could only survive till the next day. He never had to hope that his next foster family would be better than the last. He never had to hope that someday he will find home, like I did. But most of all he never has to lose hope.

He will never once will lose hope and just give up because he has parents that will never let him give up. He will never have to lose hope, knowing that he will never have a family or lose hope because he has nobody who loves him. He never has to lose hope because he will never have to feel like he didn't matter, that he can't change the world. He will never have to feel like he doesn't belong. He will never have to feel like I did.

He will never have to feel like an orphan.

I am angry at my parents sometimes because they choose their kingdom over me, their daughter. They could have kept me during the curse and we could have been a family. Maybe the curse wouldn't have broken, but we could've been together as a family. They say that this family always find each other, but why didn't they come and find me.

True love's kiss is supposed to break any curse, so what if they had kept me and I still would have broken the curse. What if all those years of loneliness, betrayal, and hurt could have been replaced with happiness, hope, and love, at no cost? I know all magic comes with a price, but what if this was a price I was willing to pay to have that life. The life that I had longed for my entire life.

I feel a hand rest on top of mine, snapping me out of my thoughts. It is Killian, of course. He see right through me. He sees past my walls and my lies. He sees past my perfection and sees my fears, my anger, and my loneliness.

We arrive at my parents new house and I park next to the curb. I look up to match his gaze. He smiles softly as he turns to me.

"No your not," he whispers, "I know you Emma. That's not the truth, but I won't push it. I don't need to. I already know what your thinking. I know your wish Emma, but I also know you would have regretted it. All that pain that you hide, all that hell you had to live through, you know in your heart that it was worth it. Because that pain is what made you who you are. My strong, independent, determined, kind, and too stubborn for her own good wife. You are my Emma and I wouldn't change a thing. You never need to do anything more than be my Emma when you are by my side, and don't you ever think that I am going to leave you because of your imperfections."