In The Darkest of Times (CaptainSwan)

Don't Tell Me Not To Worry

Emma's Pov
I wake up. My eyes slowly flutter open. The sun is peeking through the curtains, but I hear the sound of heavy rain hitting our roof. Arms are wrapped around me, Killian's. I turn to him. I brush stray strands of hair from his face. He is out cold.

I don't remember much of last night. I remember hardly being able to sleep on our long plane ride. And then I almost passed out on our way to the car. Killian had caught me as I almost teetered over. I was exhausted and I'm sure he was too, but he was always looking after me, no matter what. He said he wished he could carry me to the car, but he had all our bags, so I would just have to walk a little longer.

Once we got to the car, he set the bags down and helped me into the passenger seat. I remember bits and pieces from then on. I heard the opening and closing of the trunk, the car starting up. And him interlacing our fingers in my lap as he drove. I faintly remember him kissing the top of my head, but most of the time I was fast asleep, taken over by exhaustion.

I'm sure he carried me inside and changed me into more comfortable pajamas, before he laid me down in bed. I silently thanked him for taking my hair out. He knew that if I left it up during the night, my head would ache the next day. He remembers the simple things. That's what I love most about him.

He must have been so tired. Usually when Killian slept, he is a light sleeper, but now he was out cold. He told me our flight would get in around 3 and the drive home was around two hours, so he probably didn't go to bed till around 5. He had let me sleep for a few more hours, so would I. I glance at my alarm clock. It is almost noon. I sneak out of our bedroom quietly, walking down the stairs to the kitchen.

I get myself a hot chocolate and a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios. They seem to be the me and the baby's new favorite snack. I glance down at my tiny baby bump, barely even there, but you notice the small things when you stare or touch your stomach on a regular basis. "You like Cheerios, huh baby?" I whisper to the tiny human in my stomach. "Well I do too." I giggle. I kiss my fingers and hold them to my stomach.

I get up to put the dishes in the sink. I start to unload the clean dishes from the dishwasher. There isn't't much. Because most of the time it was just the two of us. I put all the plates away, as well as the utensils and our pots and pans. I reach up to open the cupboard above the microwave, my fingers barely reaching the handle. I open it with a bit of effort and then drop my hand back to my side with a relieved sigh. Usually Killian puts the cups away. I am too short to put them away. I never knew why we had decided to put the cups on the highest shelf, but we had. Maybe we should change that.

I don't want Killian to worry about doing anything. He has already done so much for me, so I decide on putting the cups back for him. I know it is nothing much, but I knew he would notice. I grab the first cup out of the dishwasher and reach my arm above my head to slide it into the cupboard, but apparently even then, I was too short to reach. I set it down and sigh exasperatedly. I try again, but this I used my magic to try to reach the last few inches. It is almost there when a stabbing pain shoots through my torso.

I drop the cup. It shatters on the floor as I try to deal with the pain, but I can't hold back a scream. Footsteps rush down the stairs. The pain ripples through me, as I sink to ground, gasping in pain. Killian is by my side in seconds, holding my hand, trying to prod out of me what had happened. I am in too much pain to answer him.

All I say through gritted teeth is, "The baby"

Sheer horror flashes through his face. Not my baby they couldn't take my baby. I couldn't lose them. Nausea is caught in my throat at the thought, bile forcing its way to my mouth, I hold it down. Beads of sweat roll down my forehead. We are both in fear of losing this child. The one we made with our love and treasure it so much beyond that. I gasp in pain, clutching my stomach.

"Emma. We need to take you to the hospital."

"No" I say, feeling the pain slowly subside, "I'm okay. I think I am okay now. The pain is gone."

I slump against him, feeling the pain diminish. We just hold each other for a few minutes, afraid to say anything. The whole event lasted only a couple of minutes, but they were some of the most frightening minutes of my life.

"Are you sure you're okay? We should probably take you to the..."

"Killian I'm fine."

He looks at me, not certain. I nod, nothing else is said about the matter in the moment.

"Come here," he says scouping me into his arms, "Let's get this cleaned up."

He leads me over to the couch, avoiding stepping on broken glass. I try to protest when he say that I can't help clean up. He wants me to stay put and relax.

He walks back into the kitchen to clean up the broken cup. His focus is on me making sure I don't dare move, my attention on my stomach. Of course I am worried that I could have had a miscarriage and so was Killian, but I just knew that when the pain subsided we were going to be okay. The both of us.

Killian walks back over to me, kneeling in front of me.

"Are you sure you're okay? Both of you?" He says concern filling his expression, looking for any sign of a lie.

"Yes," I say as he stood up pacing, containing his frustration.

"We both are fine so don't worry," I add.

"Bloody hell, don't tell me not to worry Emma," he yells.

I am frightened, but then he kneels back down beside me holding my cheeks in his palms, making my fear dissaperate as he spoke.

"You and this child our my life. I thought I might lose both of you. I can't lose either of you. I was scared Emma. As soon as you screamed and then I saw you in pain. And then all I heard you say was "the baby," he takes a deep breath, tears brimming in his eyelids, "I had no idea what was happening, but I knew that one of you was in danger. How can I not worry when everything I have was about to disappear right before my eyes? My child? And my wife? I had no idea what to do, but sit there letting you squash my hand, letting me know just how much pain you were in."

"Shhhh," I coo, "We're all right."

I hold my hand on the nape of his neck, allowing him to let his head fall into my lap, just holding him and him holding onto me tightly, repeating "We're okay" over and over again. Not really sure myself, if we truly were, but everything was fine and my gut told me the same. Killian holds me tightly, not taking a chance at what might happen if he let go.

Do I dare to say anything? 😂😂

All I am going to say is that this is just the beginning.

Sorry, but not sorry.

Hopefully this didn't totally crush your happiness.

Thanks for being awesome readers!!!

-pinacolada07