Abroad

Chapter 58

My friends are smart enough to stay quiet about what just happened. I can see their concerned looks though.

Bunker is full of people already. I go to the bar and order us some drinks. I drink some tequila shots before returning to my friends. I need to feel numb, I can't stand this pain anymore. Lizzie is right. I have one more class with Hero and then I'll return to Belgium. I can do this. I hand them their drinks and start dancing. Pretty soon there are some boys trying to dance with me. I let them. It's a bit disturbing that I don't feel a thing when they flirt with me. I wonder if I'll ever feel alive again. I keep offering to get us drinks because that allows me to drink some more shots. Soon I'm completely drunk. 

I'm dancing with this attractive rugby player. He's very tall and musculair with broad shoulders. I love that he has hazelnut eyes because they don't remind me of Hero's green ones. He tries to talk to me a couple of times but I don't let him. I just want to dance the night away. We don't need to talk, we don't need to bond. His hands are on my hips and he pulls me closer. He presses his lips against mine and his tongue pushes them open. It's a nice kiss but it doesn't light the fire inside me. I run my hands through his hair and he pulls away. I open my eyes and I see that he didn't pull away. Hero jerked him away and gave him a punch. Oh no! He's a rugby player, he's so much stronger than Hero is. I try to break the fight.

"Hero! Stop!" I scream but it sounds weird because of the alcohol. I tug at his arm and he gives me a push. I can't find my balance because I had too much to drink and I stumble down. I look around to find my friends. Killian comes running to us and I sigh in relief. He helps me up.

"Killian, help him," I beg when the rugby player punches Hero. Killian and Jack manage to break off the fight. I take Hero by the arm and drag him away from the fight and the crowd that has gathered around us. I don't want security to get involved. Once outside, I push him against the wall.

"What the fuck?! You asshole!" I scream at him. His eye is swelling and his lip is busted. I want to comfort him but I'm just too angry.

"Why were you kissing that guy?!" Hero yells back.

"Because I can."

"No, you can't. You can't just walk around dressed like this kissing random people. You're wasted!"

"Yes, Hero, I can. I'm free to do whatever I want," I say with venom in my voice. He looks like I slapped him.

"No," he whispers. "You're mine."

"I can assure you I'm not. You lied to me. You used me. You destroyed me!" I start yelling again. It starts raining.

"I already told you. I don't love Mel. We just dated because the studio wanted it. I didn't mind though because we were friends and I didn't have anyone else. Then I met you... From the second I met you I told her we couldn't do this anymore. I talked to her in the States and rushed back as soon as I could to see you. The studio was pretty pissed about that. You're the one that I want and I don't care what the studio says." 

My tears are mixing with the rain. The numbness is gone and the pain is back.

"Why is she here Hero? She introduced herself as your girlfriend. She has been giving interviews about your relationship. It seemed pretty real to me." My voice breaks and Hero reaches over to touch me. When his hand swipes off a tear it causes an unimaginable pain. God, I love him so much. "Don't!" I scream and stumble backwards. "After everything that I told you, you still lied to me."

"I tried to tell you so many times..."

"That's not good enough. You should've told me before this even started. I guess I'm the fool here.. you warned me not to fall in love with you." 

"I love you."

"And I don't love you. Just leave me alone. I had a nice fling with Hardin Scott." The alcohol is making me mean. Pain flashes in his eyes for a second but then his look gets cold. I shiver. The look in his eyes scares me.

"Do you really mean that?"

"Yes."

"Don't ever say that I didn't try. Because I did. I tried to fight for you. I told you how I feel about you and all you did was push me away. Have fun telling your friends about your fling." His voice is cold as ice and full of hatred. I know I shouldn't have said that but it's the only way to get him to leave me alone. His eyes are filled with pain and with one last look I run away in the rain. Around the corner I take my heels off and I keep running.