TART The Sequel [TART 3]

The Final Spark

You could make a drinking game out of my youtube video

Take a shot every time I have a nervous laugh-

I seriously can't let myself watch that video because all I hear is that painful start, my awful voice and my stupid nervous laugh and then I get self conscious and I'll end up deleting the video and I can't let myself do that! XD

WHY DO I HAVE TO BE SO AWKWARD? TwT I ended nearly every sentence with this awkward laugh and aHh

Hopefully I'll get better at talking lmfao... I wanna be able to do voiceovers and eventually streams >_>

If anyone from my school came across that video I would actually die from embarrassment-

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GUYS IM SO SCARED

THE LAST BOOK IS HERE ALSJALSJLAX

THERE'S SO MUCH ANXIETY INSIDE ME RIGHT NOW

IM NEARING THE END OF THE SERIES

AHHHH

I went to the very last page to see how many pages there was, and I swear to god, not reading that last page was the hardest thing I've ever done-

OF COURSE THIS BOOK ARRIVES WHEN IM ON MY PERIOD, this book would've probably destroyed me without my period-emotions, IMAGINE THE PAIN I WILL GO THROUGH NOW

Dear God

Listening to that "Here for you" song was a mistake while I'm reading Michael Vey

AND SOMEONE DIED IN THE PREVIOUS BOOK

AND THIS ONE CHARACTER LOVED THAT CHARACTER SO MUCH

AND NOW THEY'RE GONE

AND IM LISTENING TO A SAD LOVE SONG

AHHHH

I'm also almost halfway through it already...

And I'm so scared!! I don't want this to end!! ;-; My heart is already hurting-

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Todoroki looks so sad ;;;;;

My poor Todoroki TwT

Honestly, Todoroki has my dream superpower XD

Having ice powers or fire powers is awesome on its own

But combined?! How awesome is that?! :O I swear my biggest dream growing up (other than becoming a singer lol) was to have magic or superpowers! XD

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P commissioned me, and I was happy at first, but then I remembered that I would have to give it to him...

...maybe I can just put it in his mailbox? XD I really don't want to see him, especially not after how we left things off last time >_> I STILL FEEL SO GUILTY

I've also been so cold lately lmao. I've really been having this "I don't give a shit" mentality (and I've really been loving it lol) and Mal wrote something in this group chat that P and I was in, and I straight up left the group chat (I would've left it a lot earlier if I had known that group chat still existed)

I just couldn't be bothered lol. It was a group chat of Mal, P, and the three people we met and became friends with at UKM two years ago (and me, of course lol). I'm most likely never gonna see those three people again and quite frankly, I couldn't care less, so I just left the group chat

P messaged me afterwards and was asking if I was alright, and I was just so heartless lmao

I can't remember what I wrote but it something like "yeah, I'm just most likely never gonna meet them again so I can't be bothered to stay in the group chat 😂" and he seemed kinda sad lol

I definitely could've put that in a nicer way lmao, but I honestly just don't care XD P and I have such a shallow friendship anyway so I just don't care, and I never cared about those three other people in the first place >_>

NOT GIVING A FUCK IS SO RELAXING

But it feels like the healthy kind of not giving a fuck, you know? XD Like I've let go of so many things that I don't need to be hanging onto in the first place

I still care about things that matter, like my friends, family, art, and so on, but I've let go of sooo many things and I just can't be bothered anymore and I'm loving it XD Is this what it feels like to be a chill person? Can I be like this forever?! XD

I'm digressing lol I'm sorry, I hope you guys had/are having a great day ^-^