drarry & wolfstar & jily oneshots

Secret Keeper

ah, yes, angsty. ein au wo sirius secret keeper ist :)
mein erster oneshot auf englisch please be nice lmao

* * *

they had sirius.
they had sirius for over a week now.
they had sirius and remus knew that the chances were low, but it didn't stop the little spark of hope, the feeling of relief growing in him every time the aurors came back from a mission. sirius knew where the potters hid and cherished the secret like it was his only reason to live. no one would have ever doubted sirius' loyalty and since voldemort never attacked, even the ones who did doubt him realized that sirius would never tell.

and that was what kept remus awake at night. if sirius didn't tell them, if he never gave in, what would happen to him? voldemort wouldn't kill him that was for sure, sirius had the most important information they needed. but, remus thought shaking as the sobs broke from his throat while he sat on the cold bathroom floor in the middle of the night, would they ever stop torturing him?

it was right after they war had ended, in the same second where the aurors announced voldemort as dead, when remus and james made their way to the mansion where the death eaters had hid. they stormed through the doors, broke the sheltering charms and ran to every room they could find, frantically searching for their best friend and boyfriend.

then they found him.

and when they did, remus screamed and james just stood petrified, not able to move or talk or even think.

"no! no!" remus ran forward and dropped to his knees, too afraid to touch the person in front of him yet.

sirius was laying on the floor, hands and legs bound, his skin paler than remus had ever seen it. all over his body were cuts and whip marks and bruises and dried blood and remus felt the need to throw up. sirius wasn't moving, just slowly blinking up at him when remus gently felt for his pulse.

"is he- is he-" james couldn't say the word when he kneeled next to remus and looked down at sirius' body, clearly horrified.

"he's breathing" remus told him quietly and stroked sirius' hair, hoping to comfort him but when he felt fresh, warm blood on his fingers he withdrew his hand as if it had burned him. james and remus both wanted to free their friend, wanted to cut the ropes and help him up but they knew that they should wait. they didn't know if they could cause sirius even more pain.

"sirius? can you hear me?" asked james but sirius just blinked. just blinked and breathed out, his breathing going ragged.

"he is in pain. i mean- obviously" james put his head in his hands and sighed. "fuck, pads, what happened?" he murmured, knowing that he wouldn't get an answer.

"i never" sirius suddenly whispered. his voice raspy and breaking as if he hadn't talked for weeks. or only screamed in pain, remus thought bitterly as he leaned closer to stroke sirius' wet cheek comfortingly. he must've been crying.

"i never told" sirius said quietly, his eyes closing as he fainted.

—

all the way to sankt mungo's remus never left sirius' side. he was there when the aurors came, was there when they brought him to the hospital and was there while he and mcgonagall waited for the doctors to tell them the news. james needed to be with lily and harry so he couldn't be there. when remus was finally let inside and told that sirius wasn't in life threatening danger anymore, he felt the relief crash down on him, pulling at his shoulder and lungs as if he could finally breathe again.

that was until he saw sirius.

remus' heart broke when he looked at his boyfriend, at the love of his life, wrapped in bandages and band aids, having multiple stitched wounds and bruises over his arms, face, neck, chest. sirius was laying on the hospital bed, his eyes wide open and staring at remus with an unreadable expression. hesitantly remus walked over to him and sat down on the bed, carefully avoiding any contact.