Panic Attacks // Ruel // English

Chapter 56

Our fingers intertwine as I hold Ruel's hand. He vigorously swings our arms forward and back as we walk past an immense flower field. The scent of flowers is good for both of us. Ruel has the most pure smile on his face and his eyes look as if they see nothing more than the beauty of the world. He swings his arm and makes it spin around my body, forcing me to do a pirouette to keep my arm from tangling. I almost lose my balance, but I keep myself standing by putting one hand on his chest and seeking support. His warm laughter fills my ears.

Yasmine: "You know what you can do here too?" I ask Ruel as we walk further along the fields and look at the beauty of the flowers.
Ruel: "I don't know. Want can we do?" He says as if he wants to hear the answer from me and not start a gambling match.
Yasmine: "You can pick flowers here and make your own bouquet."
The expression on his face changes to very enthusiastic about the idea of ​​picking flowers. I know he wanted to do that for a very long time.
Ruel: "Then what are we waiting for Darcie?" He shouts enthusiastically, as he grabs me by the hips, lifts me up and spins me around. I feel like I can fly and leave everything behind. That's how free I feel. My wings have finally dried and become strong. He sets me on the ground and takes my hand again to take me closer and closer to the place.

Ruel: "Why do you know me so well?" Ruel asks as I run my fingers very carefully along the buds of the flowers. I need to feel them, but I don't want to damage them. Petals feel softer than you might think.
Yasmine: "That's because everyone underestimates my feelings. Everyone thinks I have a really cold heart and that nothing really cares for me. But actually I'm just as sensitive as you are, so I can sense you a little bit. Oh and you're one of those softies who loves flowers. It's cute though." I say laughing.
Ruel: "I'm not a softie at all." He denies.

I see a fat bumblebee flying our way and Ruel shrinks from fear. He lets go of my hand and runs away from the bumblebee.

Yasmine: "Oh no?" I ask with a smile.
He pulls himself together again by straightening his back and walking towards me with a tough look.
Yasmime: "Ruel it was a bumblebee. Bumblebees don't just sting."
I can't take the half grin off my face. It is just too funny.

Ruel: "Okay maybe I am a little bit of a softie." He admits.
Yasmine: "I think a big bit ... But you sure can be very manly." I say laughing.

We walk a bit further towards the opening of the flower picking garden. Ruel has put his denim jacket over his broad shoulder, because it is quite warm in the brightly shining sun. But it does me good. Suddenly butterflies come from everywhere and they fly around us. Brown, red, white, blues, orange. They all seem different. As if a magic spell has been cast and caused butterflies to appear. A small white butterfly settles on the point of Ruel's nose. He looks cross-eyed at the butterfly that tickles his nose with its little legs. A feeling of joy flies through me and it gives me a pure smile.

Yasmime: "It looks very nice on you."  I say when I look at the butterfly.
Ruel: "I think the blue butterfly on your shoulder is much prettier."
I look at my left shoulder and look at the large flapping wings.

Carefully, without scaring the butterflies, Ruel takes his phone from his pocket and snaps a picture of me and the butterfly. Then he takes a weird selfie with his butterfly on his nose. But I take the phone out of his hand and take the most adorable picture of him in existence. His eyes start to twinkle. Ruel takes over his phone again and I see him go into settings. Later he turns his phone lock screen towards me and I see the picture of me and the butterfly.

Yasmine: "You can be such a sweetheart."
I seem to melt away. Not the heat. But because of him. His warmth.

The butterflies fly away again and we keep walking. I can already see where we need to be.

The old woman at the entrance tells us how to pick the flowers so as not to destroy them and lets us do our own thing. Pull the stem close to the ground. That should be fine.

I decided to make a bouquet for the whole Van Dijk family. Just because I am grateful to be with them so often. And that they want to take me into their family, while I am actually not related to them. Grateful for caring about me so much. I have never had this much love together at a time. It overwhelms me sometimes.

I don't know who Ruel makes his bouquet for. But I underestimated his style. I thought it would be all colors and all types, but it looks really, really nice. Lots of light colors and white. He chooses his flowers very fussy. He is not just satisfied and will do everything he can to make it perfect.

Ruel: "Are you looking at me now?" He asks sternly, stifling his smile.
Yasmine: "Yes, I'm watching what you was doing." I admit with a laugh.

After a while Ruel walks up to me with a beautiful white flower. He made it shorter than any other flower he picked. He comes up right in front of me and looks deep into my eyes. His hand slowly runs through my hair at my right ear and pushes the flower into my hair. He makes sure she was secure and can't just fall out of my hair.

Ruel: "This one stands for your perseverance." He says proudly.
I feel my pupils grow when I look at him with gratitude.
Yasmine: "Thank you." I thank him softly.

He puts two fingers under my chin, they gently push my head up a little when I look at the flowers in the ground. He presses a kiss on my lips and then walks back to his own flowers after he runs his hand over my face for a second.

Ruel: "She looks beautiful on you." Ruel says proudly over his shoulder as he walks away.
He leaves me feeling shy. But it doesn't bother me. The reason actually feels good.

I stare ahead at the flowers. My eyes blur, but the fresh sweet scent of the flowers fills my nose. It's really magical here. I had hoped I could stay here longer, as long as I need. Could live here. Can wake up every day among the flowers. Unfortunately, they are only there in the spring. Only the fields of wild flowers bloom longer. At first glance it looks like a mess, but if you look closely you will see the true nature and you will start to appreciate it. These flowers also attract bees and butterflies. These flowers also smell good. These flowers also look beautiful. They are just different. But there is nothing wrong with being different, that makes you special. That sets you apart from all the others.

Ruel: "Hey, I am done." Ruel calls to me from a few feet away. My head comes back to earth and I look at him.
Yasmine: "Ehm yes me too." I call back.

We take our flowers back to the woman from a while ago. Her name plate says: Genevieve.
She puts the flowers on the counter and turns them into a complete bouquet.

Genevieve: "Did you give that flower to her?" She asks Ruel.
He regains the proud look as his eyes move from hers to mine, and he nods.
Genevieve: "You have chosen a very beautiful one. These flowers are not very common." She tells him when she rolls the flowers in a piece of paper so we can take them with us.
Ruel: "A rare flower for a rare woman."
My cheeks blush from his comment.

We pay for the flowers and Ruel takes the bouquets in his arms. Just when we want to walk away, I feel the woman's hand on my shoulder. I turn and she moves her head closer to mine so she can whisper in my ear.

Genevieve: "Be wise and keep him in your heart as long as you can and can handle it. You need each other."

I gently nod and give her a warm smile, then leave the premises.

Ruel says goodbye, but my mind stays on the words she told me.

Ruel: "What did she want to say?" He asks curiously.
Yasmine: "Oh nothing special." I lie. It was actually very special.