Panic Attacks // Ruel // English

Chapter 23

Of course I will be looked at when I find my way out.
I yelled at him so much that enough people could hear me.

I push the heavy door open with all my weight and I already feel that a tear has escaped. The cold wind comes to my body and blows my hair out of my face.

With my hands in my hair, I stand on the sidewalk and try to control my hyperfentilate. I close my eyes and watch my breathing. But because I keep my eyes closed, the images that my father has brought back are returning.

Then I hear the door open so I turn my head and see who it is.
A tall boy walks out and keeps looking at me from a distance.

Yasmine: "You heard everything, didn't you?"
He walks closer to me and immediately peace comes over me.
Ruel: "Sorry, I'd be lying if I said no."

I turn to face him.
Yasmine: "I should never have gone." I say as I wipe my cheeks with the back of my hand.
He grabs my shoulders and hugs me.
All the bad tension slips away and I can breathe normally again. My head rests against his chest and he scratches my head very gently.

Ruel: "It's going to be okay. Don't tell me until you're ready for it." He whispers, causing a shiver down my spine. Suddenly he has control over me. And I totally surrendered to him.

He grabs my hips and gently pushes me against the wall. My heart starts to beat faster and the strange feeling returns.
He completely enclosed me and I have nowhere to go. His arms are next to my head against the wall and I stand between his legs.
His eyes shine through the moonlight and his hair falls slightly forward.
This contact makes me already breathe heavier. From his eyes I look at his full pink colored lips.

He comes closer with his head and goes to my ear.
Ruel: "You look beautiful tonight." He whispers.
His words tingle my body, I tilt my head slightly and a gasp escapes.
What is he doing to me? I've never felt this way with anyone. But I can't counter it either. I want to feel this more often.

He looks straight at me and then his eyes return to my lips.
I can't stop the attraction. I want to feel his lips. Now.

I put my arms around his neck and I let the space between us become increasingly narrow.
He puts his hand on my neck and one on my lower back.
The space in between keeps shrinking and now I feel his warm breath blowing against my skin.
I can't take the tension between us anymore. My heart rate is so high that you can almost hear it and my skin is burning.
I lean forward slightly and our lips touch. He immediately closes his soft lips around mine. Apparently he was waiting for my response. The tingling flies through my whole body, it is a great feeling. He strokes my lower lip with the tip of his tongue. My lips parted even further and I let his tongue slide in.
His hands move all over my body and I keep my hands in his hair and his back.
Every time our tongues touch, tingling and my skin burns even more.
I seem to forget everything around me, all I feel now is Ruel's touches. He makes me calm down and long for him at the same time.

I interrupt the kiss to catch my breath. And smiles appear on our faces, along with relief. I rest my head on his chest before he wraps his arms around me.

Ruel: "Maybe I should go back in again. I said I had to go to the toilet. But it will take a long time." He says half laughing.
I do his hair a little more decently and nod.
Yasmine: "Will you promise me that what happens between us in this area will stay between us? I don't think it will be safe for you if it comes out now."
He holds my face between his hands and looks at me comfortably.
Ruel: "Promised." He says softly.

I take a deep breath and then walk towards the door, with Ruel behind me. He helps me open the heavy door, which makes me laugh. Who takes a door that you have to hang on with your whole body weight?