Different colored minds

A new friendship

MAVERICK POV

I sit alone outside on a bench at 11:30. It's lunch time. I watch all of the people sit with their friends and giggle about their days. I see a few people like me sprawled out on the lawn alone, and then my eyes catch on to something odd. Joe is sitting alone and Steven is sitting in the grass laughing with the group of friends that used to follow Joe. My eyes are now trained on him. He doesn't seem bothered, he's eating a sandwich and watching birds from the slice of pavement his wheelchair is on. I feel my brows crease as I take another bight of my carrot. I look back towards Steven and the pack of the football team. I bet they're talking about the upcoming football game. Then I watch Steven's eyes wander towards Joe.

I've known these kids since elementary school, I think that's why I find this encounter so odd. Ever since they were young the two of them have been inseparable. If anything I thought that Steven would be trying to be there for him  more because of his leg. Something isn't right. I would go over there and say hi, but Joe wouldn't talk to me. And besides, even if he did. What would we talk about? There's nothing we have in common. My sole memory of having a conversation with Joe proved exactly that. It was sophomore year and we had history class together. I remember the teacher pairing us up to work together. Throughout the entire project I think he actually said his opinion maybe once. Other than that, he stuck to the section of the assignment that he agreed on doing. The only time that I would consider us having any conversation was the one day he came over to work on the project at my house. Of course, during the day I hide the more obvious pieces of my gaming persona, but even then it didn't matter. He glanced at my room with disgust and decided to sit on the floor. I think he already assumed we had nothing in common and it colored his perception of what a conversation with me would accomplish. I can tell that because if Joe doesn't find you interesting, he doesn't mentally invest in anything that you say. He just sits and forces the burden of the talking onto the other person. I think for some reason he assumes that conversation should be something that flows--I think he's just being ignorant. The odd thing is, I don't think he even realizes that he stops putting the effort in. I've watched him talk to other people without problem, just not people like me. People he doesn't want to put the effort into.

I sigh and take another bight of my carrot. In the end it's pretty inconsequential--in fact it's mostly expected, but now that I'm staring at him all alone on the pavement I feel a pang of guilt. Is he alone now because he translated that lack of effort towards everyone? Is he all alone now?

I look down at the rest of my lunch. Part of me would like to let myself just let it go, but I can feel it. The pang of not letting someone be left behind. My eyes catch onto my rice crispy treat, I know he's going to think I'm weird if I go up to him so I need a back up plan. And who doesn't like rice crispy treats. With one more sharp intake of breath I get up and zip my lunch bag shut. Here goes nothing--

I look up at the sky. I know God doesn't do brownie points, but sometimes it would be useful. I sling my bag over my shoulder and begin the trek over to him. I'm about three feet away when his eyes meet mine. There's a glint of surprise as I stop in front of him with my rice crispy in my hand as an offering.

"Why are you giving me this?" He looks down at it skeptically.

I shrug. "You looked like you could use it." He looks up at me curiously.

"Can I sit here and eat my lunch with you?" I ask. Joe still looks confused. Maybe in another situation this would make me laugh, but since it's coming from Joe, it seems more menacing. I take a subconscious breath.

"Sure," he finally says awkwardly. So I sit down. I don't know why I'm doing this, I should have just left him alone. But I don't know, maybe I just saw myself in him--just because I sit alone for lunch doesn't mean that I want to be alone all the time. Everyone wants a friend. And everyone knows what it's like to lose a friend.

It's odd sitting next to him. I don't know what to say either. He just makes me anxious.
"Nice weather we're having," I blurt. He looks at me.
"Im having lunch alone on purpose. Im not lonely," he continues.
"I see," I state. I knew this was a bad idea. I eat in silence next to him from that point on. He doesn't make me leave which is nice. And he doesn't talk which is fine. I don't even know why I did this to myself. I just had a feeling. I guess that's what it points to. Not only that, but Steven has always given me the Creeps. Not in an I hate him way but like sometimes he just is a bit... oblivious.
I didnt understand why Joe befriended him because Joe always seemed so judge mental. I'm not wrong about that, at least I don't think I'm wrong. Am I being judge mental? And the existential dread within me grows.

"Why are you staring at Steven so hard?" He asks.
"He looks lonely," I comment. It was a look I saw steven have it written on his face earlier.
"Why do you care about people you don't talk to?" He says with a straight face.
"I don't talk to anyone regularly, bet you thought I was weird coming up to you," I add.
He smiles and continues eating his lunch.
I munch on my own lunch.
"Do you think about other people or yourself?" I ask suddenly.
He looks at me contemplatively.
"I don't know,"