Different colored minds

The stream

MAVERICK POV

I can't sleep, so I decide to stream.
No one knows what I went through today. All those kids who watch my channel all think I had a normal school day, went home and turned on the camera. They don't know what I actually went through. I know I did the right thing, I can feel it in my bones that today I made good decisions. But now the pain is coming. The pain is gushing over me, I didn't even know those kids that died. I just... I should have done more. I should have been able to do more. But I couldn't. I couldn't do more.

What's up with you today?

You alright dude?

I don't know what to say. These people have known me for years at this point.

Play call of duty.

Play halo.

Can you play Mario sunshine?

I look at the comment. It looks like the person that wrote it is named Pam. I smile, I bet it's Pam. I think she figured it out.

"Why not? That's a good one," I pull out my switch.

It's nice thinking it's Pam. Like I know one of my fans personally. It's funny.

"Thanks Pam," I say to the camera and take out the game.

Where are your abs?

We want to see the abs!

Where is our hottie?

How will you make fun of kids while playing Mario Sunshine?

The chat is blowing up. It makes me laugh.

"I hate to break this to you guys, but bullying kindergarteners is not the only thing I enjoy doing while gaming,"

Boo.

Bully the kids.

How else will they learn?

I laugh, "not tonight my dudes."

I pull open the game. Bright colors, sunshine, childhood. Warmth. Everything that I didn't have today.

Thanks _freetimekiller_. Today was a tough one. -Pam

"Me too," I say back sadly.

What?

Why?

Are you going through a hard time?

BABY NO!

Not our hottie.

I don't know what to do.

You got this _freetimekiller_. I'm sure you did great today.

Nothing can take you down.

Don't let the kindergartner bully you!
You're better than a sniveling kid.

Don't be down in the dumps man, you got us!

I think it was at this point that the tears came.

You can do it!

You got this!

We're here for you.

The tears won't stop, they're making the screen blurry. All these people. If I died they wouldn't have known. I would have just disappeared.

We'll get through this together dude.-Pam

She would have told them. She would have told them I died. And I realize, if I do die, I'd want Pam to break it to them. A good friend. Someone to watch over them. The people who treasure my hard work.