Chapter 112: Bickering

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Luo Qingyang knew that among all the sects she wasn't going to be turning any heads for her cultivation or swordsmanship. She was in the same generation as a whole slew of sect heirs. Their generation boasted cultivators like Lan Wangji, who already surpassed many cultivators older than him. Jin Zixuan was arrogant, but that arrogance accompanied impressive skills. Jiang Wanyin was a formidable cultivator, exceeding the skills of Luo Qingyang by far. He didn't always place in sect competitions, but it wasn't really from lack of skill, it was that their generation happened to have a lot of very talented cultivators.

Wei Wuxian was another of the many exemplary cultivators in their generation. It was possible he was on par with Lan Wangji, despite most competitions putting him a few places below. The archery competition supported this theory as Wei Wuxian took first, just barely squeaking ahead of Lan Wangji. Meanwhile the gap between the two of them and third place was more pronounced, and fourth place was a several times bigger gap. Luo Qingyang got the impression Wei Wuxian held himself back a lot in most competitions.

This suspicion had grown after several evenings with a distraught and emotionally exhausted Jiang Yanli during their studies at Cloud Recesses. One thing Luo Qingyang learned, once she got past Jiang Yanli's calm shy exterior, was that Jiang Yanli was struggling under a pile of responsibilities. By the time the lectures ended at Cloud Recesses, Luo Qingyang had learned entirely too much about the family dynamics of the Jiang Clan and exactly the kind of toll they were taking on Jiang Yanli. Among the things Luo Qingyang learned was just how much pressure Jiang Yanli was under.

Luo Qingyang was not really seen as anyone important. She wasn't a sect heir, a child of a main clan, not even a member of the branch families of a clan. Her mother was a servant in the WuzhouLi sect. In the eyes of the cultivation world, Luo Qingyang was a nobody, but her mother made her feel like she was the whole world. Her mother was a proud and confident woman who was admittedly better at being tactful than Luo Qingyang was. Her mother wanted her to do what made her happy and be proud of herself. The rest of the cultivation world had no expectations for her at all. If expectations meant the sort of pressure Jiang Yanli was under, then Luo Qingyang thought expectations might be some sort of curse.

Jiang Yanli had felt so pressured by her mother to excel in cultivation that Jiang Yanli had practically had a meltdown as a child. The word 'meltdown' may have been an exaggeration on Luo Qingyang's part. It wasn't like Jiang Yanli had thrown a tantrum. Luo Qingyang sincerely doubted Jiang Yanli would even know how to throw a tantrum. However, essentially giving up on cultivating because you felt you would never achieve what was being asked of you was a sort of drastic solution. Jiang Yanli had been so young at the time, like seven years old, young. What was Yu Ziyuan doing that a seven year old was feeling that kind of pressure?

Then there was Wei Wuxian and Jiang Wanyin. It was clear Jiang Yanli adored them both. The thought of having to choose between them was enough to shatter Jiang Yanli's heart. Something Luo Qingyang got to see more than once at Cloud Recesses and it was painful to watch. Jiang Wanyin was subjected to the same sort of pressure that had killed Jiang Yanli's will to cultivate. Bonus was that Wei Wuxian was practically the same age as Jiang Wanyin. Practically the same age. Included in things as though he was one of their siblings. Even rooming with Jiang Wanyin when they were little.

Jiang Yanli seemed to feel that Wei Wuxian was a blessing in their home. She described him as being kind and playful. He made their home brighter just by being there. He helped Jiang Wanyin connect with the other disciples and make friends. Wei Wuxian excelled in his studies and cultivation, and Yu Ziyuan never let Jiang Wanyin forget it. Every one of Yu Ziyuan's complaints were always accompanied by the name 'Wei Wuxian'. She dropped the blame of everything at his feet and Wei Wuxian accepted it like it was a gift. It was not something Luo Qingyang had expected to learn about Wei Wuxian. Being so outgoing and cheerful, and annoying, Luo Qingyang would not have expected him to be someone who just accepted blame.

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