Backlash Part 1

Chapter 55: The Jingshi

Wei Wuxian didn't have much of an appetite, but he still managed to eat about half of his morning meal. Though only after Lan Wangji agreed to feed it to him. Wei Wuxian was honestly surprised how quickly Lan Wangji agreed to it. Lan Wangji didn't even call him shameless. It made Wei Wuxian think that Lan Wangji had not been exaggerating with what he said this morning.

The thought that it hurt Lan Wangji to see him in distress made Wei Wuxian's heart ache painfully. At the same time it all filled him with an oddly comforting feeling. Lan Wangji had said that he needed to hold Wei Wuxian to heal. Right now, in Lan Wangji's arms, Wei Wuxian understood this completely. The memories and emotions of his nightmare, his past, had left him feeling raw inside. Lan Wangji's embrace felt like a soothing ointment. Warm and gentle, it took away the sting of injury and made him feel almost peaceful.

"Lan Zhan?" Wei Wuxian prodded gently. They had been sitting quietly in the garden for a long time now. Lan Wangji's fingers gently playing with Wei Wuxian's hair in a way that Wei Wuxian found very pleasing.

"Mn." Lan Wangji replied to assure Wei Wuxian he was listening. Wei Wuxian licked his lips somewhat nervously.

"Did... did I say much during my nightmare, or when I was starting to come to?" Wei Wuxian asked somewhat hesitantly. Lan Wangji considered how to respond.

"It hurts." Lan Wangji replied. "More later." Lan Wangji added, somewhat hesitantly. Wei Wuxian sighed.

"I see..." Wei Wuxian said quietly. When he didn't continue, Lan Wangji began to get worried.

"Remember?" Lan Wangji asked. Wei Wuxian grimaced slightly.

"Not really... and..." Wei Wuxian hesitated for a long time. "Part of my nightmare..." Wei Wuxian seemed to be struggling with what to say. Lan Wangji placed a gentle kiss in Wei Wuxian's hair.

"Will always listen to Wei Ying," Lan Wangji said softly. Wei Wuxian bit his lip lightly.

"Did I say anything about my golden core?" Wei Wuxian asked.

"Mn." Lan Wangji confirmed.

"So... you probably know then..." Wei Wuxian said under his breath.

"Wei Ying gives too much. Jiang Wanyin... did not deserve it." Lan Wangji said, his voice darkening slightly. "Still respect Wei Ying's decision." Wei Wuxian nuzzled against Lan Wangji as he took deep breaths of his soothing sandalwood scent.

"I dreamed about the surgery. The fall of Lotus Pier." Wei Wuxian spoke quietly. "Wen Chao's mistress came to Lotus Pier with Wen Zhuliu and several cultivators. She demanded Madam Yu punish me," Wei Wuxian said quietly.

"She whipped me with Zidian. I'm not sure how many times. A dozen or so probably. Wang Lingjiao wasn't satisfied... She demanded Madam Yu chop off one of my hands." Wei Wuxian's voice was quiet and steady. There was no anger or fear in his tone. Just a very quiet thread of pain.

"Wan Lingjiao wanted to turn Lotus Pier into a supervisory office of the QishanWen sect. When Madam Yu... aggressively refused, an army descended on Lotus Pier." Wei Wuxian continued in a hushed whisper. "Madam Yu knew Lotus Pier was going to fall. She bound me and Jiang Cheng with Zidian." A tear slid down Wei Wuxian's cheek soundlessly.

"At the time that was the worst night of my life. The things Madam Yu said to me as she whipped me... Of course they were things she had said before, but that night... That's the night I finally believed every word. Every word she screamed at me... Every word Jiang Cheng screamed at me. The last thing Madam Yu told me was to protect Jiang Cheng with my life."

Lan Wangji's emotions were raging inside of him but he contained them. There would be time for his anger and outrage, but right now Wei Ying needed his silence and support. Lan Wangji's fingers continued to gently play with Wei Wuxian's hair in a soft repetitive motion. Wei Wuxian's was speaking so quietly it was almost as though he were whispering this story. Like it was too much for him to speak the words any louder.