Backlash Part 1

Chapter 78: Like Old Times

Wei Wuxian clung to Lan Wangji a little longer before facing the daunting task of greeting his shidi and shimei. This should have been something he looked forward to. He loved his shidi and shimei. He always had fun teaching them and goofing around. It was always good. Until he saw them die. Wei Wuxian took a deep breath and reconstructed the person he used to be.

'Just for a little while. Just enough to put them at ease. I can do it for a little while.' Wei Wuxian repeated to himself silently. Wei Wuxian led the way to the training grounds. Along the way he pointed out things and places to Lan Wangji. He was chatting excitedly, but Lan Wangji could still hear the anxiety threaded through Wei Wuxian's voice. Lan Wangji didn't comment. He knew Wei Wuxian was trying to distract himself, hoping to get through the coming interaction without too much trouble.

Lan Wangji knew that this would be hard for Wei Wuxian no matter what. Whether he successfully passed himself off as fine or not. Lan Wangji had no way to know which option would hurt less. He didn't know how badly this would hurt Wei Wuxian. It was possible it could be worse than Wei Wuxian expected. It was also possible that Wei Wuxian's anxiety was running through a worst case scenario that wasn't going to happen. Since Lan Wangji didn't have these answers all he could do was cooperate with Wei Wuxian's desire to distract himself and stay close in case he needed to intercede on Wei Wuxian's behalf.

"Shixiong!" The first excited exclamation was quickly followed by a chorus of disciples repeating the address. Lan Wangji was the only one close enough to see the slight tensing of Wei Wuxian's shoulders before he turned to the disciples with a bright smile.

It took a lot of effort for Lan Wangji to hold himself back and not stop the horde of disciples from rushing to Wei Wuxian and smothering him in a series of hugs and tackles. There were many cries about how much they missed Wei Wuxian, and chattering voices talking about things that happened while Wei Wuxian was gone. Wei Wuxian responded in a bright tone as he began to tease the young disciples in an animated voice.

No matter how bright and cheerful Wei Wuxian sounded right now, Lan Wangji knew that wasn't how Wei Wuxian was feeling. Wen Qing had warned Lan Wangji that Wei Wuxian was very good at pretending he was okay. Only now did Lan Wangji realize the true extent of that. In the months at Cloud Recesses Wei Wuxian had never put on such a show. It filled Lan Wangji with a mixture of feelings. Joy and pride that Wei Wuxian was willing to be honest and vulnerable in Cloud Recesses. Pain and anger that Wei Wuxian did not feel safe in Lotus Pier. Lan Wangji had found a very particular feeling steadily growing in his chest. A dark and seething hatred.

Lotus Pier had been Wei Wuxian's home, and Wei Wuxian did not feel safe there.

Lan Wangji hated Lotus Pier.

Lotus Pier was known to be a free and open place. Cloud Recesses had three thousand rules regulating behaviour, but Wei Wuxian was more free and at ease there than he was in Lotus Pier.

Lan Wangji hated Lotus Pier.

Lotus Pier had Wei Wuxian for years. Years to raise him, treasure him, and accept him. Wei Wuxian did not feel treasured or accepted. It was obvious because Wei Wuxian was very clearly not used to those things.

Lan Wangji hated Lotus Pier.

"Is anyone going to try these and let me know how they turned out?" Jiang Yanli's voice carried across the noise of the disciples crowding around Wei Wuxian. Suddenly the crowd of disciples was all running eagerly towards her. Each one trying to push past the other to get their first. Lan Wangji saw Wei Wuxian let out a small shaking breath of relief before he again bounded forward with fake energy.

"Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian called brightly. Lan Wangji did his best not to immediately scowl and stand in between them. Wei Wuxian scampered over to the YunmengJiang sect heir and hooked an arm around his shoulders in a sort of sideways hug.