I didn't let go of Iros hand. Today might be his last day. The doctors will give him a series of test at titignan kung may response o pagbabago ba.
I prayed silently. Nakikiusap ako sa lahat ng santo na sana ay buhayin nila si Iros. I don't care if maging baldado siya, wala sa katinuan o dumoble ang pagiging suplado. I will bare everything basta kasama ko siya at buhay.
"Anak, I'm sorry if mommy wasn't by your side eversince. I love you anak. Kung ano man ang mangyari I will make sure to check with your son always. Kung nahihirapan ka na it's okay if you want to go already, kami na ang bahala sa mag-ina mo."
Umiwas ako ng tingin nang simulan ng mommy nila siyang kausapin. Everyone is present, Iros' grandparents, parents, other family and friends. Even his racing team ay dumalaw kahapon.
It is my first time meeting most of them pero sa ganitong sitwasyon pa. I was only imagining before na ipapakilala ako ni Iros sa magulang niya but dumating nalang sa ganitong sitwasyon ay hindi naman masaya.
Napunta sa akin ang tingin ng mommy ni Iros. "You don't need to do this. May anak na kayo ni Iros, you are family whatever happens."
"I am not doing this for anyone Tita. Ginagawa ko 'to because I want to fulfill one of Iros dream."
Bago pa man tignan ng mga doctor si Iros ay nakiusap ako sa kanila na kung pwede ay bigyan muna kami ng kaonting oras. Kahit na wala sa kamalayan si Iros ay gusto ko siyang pakasalan. I will forever mark him in my heart. Whatever happens after today I will bring with me the love we have.
I want to be a San Jose. I want to be called Iros' wife.
"Paris, nandiyan na si Father," Cali whispered. Tumayo ako at sinalubong ang Pari.
"Thank you for coming, Father. Alam ko po na hindi ito katulad ng usual na kasal na ginagawa niyo."
Ngumiti siya sa akin. Masuyo niyang hinaplos ang balikat ko. I am a little ashamed of myself, I don't even go to Church. "Naiintindihan ko ang sitwasyon. Magpakatatag ka, Hija. The Lord doesn't give us challenges we cannot surpass."
I just nod in response. Iros will not like it if I keep on crying kaya pinigil ko na bago pa man mangyari.
Everyone settled down. Tumayo ang lahat and go closer to Iros bed para saksihan ang isang bittersweet na tagpo. Hindi lang pamilya ni Iros ang nandito, everyone na mahalaga sa aming dalawa ay narito even Denise and dad who insisted to see Iros for the last time kahit na mahina rin siya.
Hawak ko ang kamay ni Iros habang nagdedeliver ng sermon si Father. I am pressing his hand everytime na parang maiiyak ako. Sa kanya ako kumuha ng lakas para hindi maglupasay sa lapag.
"We are witnessing God's one precious gift to us; unconditional love. Iros might be gone anytime soon but his love to our beloved Paris will surely live eternally. Isang mahalagang leksyon ang nasa harap natin ngayon, mahalin natin ang mga nakapaligid sa atin hangga't sa abot ng ating makakaya. We cannot argue with anyone's time, maaring mawala ang kahit sino man sa atin anumang oras."
Napuno ng hikbi ang loob ng hospital ngunit si Irene at ang kanilang Lola ang mas nangibabaw. My pain is unbearable, theirs might be more. Iros was with them longer than he is with me. Iros is the bunso, and loosing him first is like a nightmare in their family.
"We might have to bid our goodbyes to our beloved brother, Iros for now, but when our time comes we will join him in eternal peace. Panalangin natin na sana ay magising na siya ngunit kung hindi man ay gabayan niya tayong lahat lalo na ang kanyang mag-ina."
Sumulyap ako kay Iros. Every word from Father made me reminisce all the moment I had with Iros, from the very first time I saw him, the first butterfly in my stomach he gave me, the first cry, first I love you's. There's a big flashback in mind that I can't no longer control.
