Direct Message - A.I 5SOS

Chapter Forty-Nine

Chapter Forty-Nine

"Did I hear you correctly or..." I trail off, uncertainty lacing my voice.

"What do you think I said?"

I sigh quietly, "Did you just ask me to go on tour with you?"

"Yes, I did. Would you like to come on tour with me and the boys Mil?"

Did he seriously just ask me to go on tour with him and the boys? Like the tour where they travel around the world and sing on stage to all there fans? Like the same tour that my friends have been waiting for forever.

"I...Ash, I can't."

"Why not?" he says, he mouth going down at the sides.

"I can't just barge into your lives like that. I've literally known you a day Ash and with my knee and everything, I can be very annoying and I don't want you or the other boys to have to put up with that. And with me being extremely depressed, I would just be a burden for you to bring Ash," I say truthfully, ignoring the fact that the other boys are listening.

"I don't care baby girl. And you won't be barging into our lives, we want you to come. It was the boys who suggested I bring you with us. And I don't care if you need help walking, I will be right there to help you and I'm sure the boys will understand and help out. And you won't be a burden. Ever. How could you think that? I want you to come because I want to help you Milly," he says while walking over to me and placing his hands on my cheeks.

"I'm still not sure Ash. I'll just get in the way," I mumble while looking down at the floor.

"Baby girl, you will not get in the way," Ash says sternly.

"Milly please come on tour with us," I hear Calum whine from the computer. 

"Maybe," I whisper to Ash.

I watch as his lips turn into a big goofy smile and he puts his arms around my waist, picking me up. I let out a little squeal, unprepared for the lack of contact to the stool I'm sitting on. Ashton giggles at me before burying his face in my shoulder.

I put my arms around his neck, playing with the ends of his hair. I rest my cheek on his head, his hair tickling my nose. I can feel a sneeze coming on so I quickly pull away before letting out a little sneeze into my hand. I look up and see Ashton staring at me, his mouth in the shape of an 'O'.

"That was the cutest sneeze I have heard in my entire life baby girl," Ash says while smiling.

"How can a sneeze be cute?" I ask.

"The sound of it Milly," I hear Michael say from Sykpe.

I reach over and turn the laptop around so I can see the boys. I wave at them and they all wave back, big smiles on their faces. These boys are cuties, not gonna lie. They're just so fun, silly, playful. It's amazing how they can just be so laid back but be serious at the same time.

"So, you coming with Milly?" Luke asks.

"Maybe. I'll think about it," I say.

Ashton puts me back down on the stool and I spin around in it so I can face the boys. Ashton goes back around the counter to start cooking the pancakes. The boys and I make idle chatter, them leading the conversation most of the time.

When the pancakes are done, Ash puts two on a plate in one stack before putting butter and lots of maple syrup on it. He places the plate in front of me then hands me a knife and fork.

"Thank you," I say with a big cheesy smile on my face.

"You're very welcome baby girl," he says before he turns around and finishes making his.

I quickly dig in, enjoying the very delicious pancakes that Ash made. Through breakfast the boys and I all chat, most of what we say being something silly or ridiculous. And the thing is, every time I laugh or smile, I can't help but notice the way Ashtons' eyes light up or the way a smile makes its way onto his face.

By the end of breakfast my stomach hurts from laughing so much. It feels weird though. It feels extremely strange to laugh so much. I haven't laughed like this since before my operation. It's such a strange feeling to have a smile on my face. It makes me feel like I'm getting better but then I see my knee brace and I can't help it. I stop laughing.

"What's wrong Milly?" Luke asks when he sees me staring down.

"Baby girl," Ash says warily.

"I... I'll be back," I say quietly before getting up, grabbing my crutches and walking out of the kitchen and into the bathroom.

I close the door behind me, flicking the lock. I drop my crutches onto the ground with a thud before hopping over to the sink and looking at my reflection in the mirror. I can see the tears welling up in my eyes, ready to spill over the waterline.

How could I forget? How could these boys distract me so much that I forget about everything. That I forget about everything important to me. That I forget why Ashton is actually here. That I forget why I am actually talking to these boys. That I forget why I am actually running my razor across my wrists.

My tears roll down my cheeks and fall into the sink, mixing with the droplets of blood that have fallen into the porcelain bowl. I quickly put the razor away after rinsing the blood off it. Then I run my wrists under the cold stream of water, hissing in pain. 

I quickly grab some bandages from the cupboard and wrap those around my wrists before pulling my sleeves back down so you can't see them. Then I wipe my tears away and clean myself up. Making sure there are no visible spots of blood around I grab my crutches off the ground before walking back to the kitchen.

When Calum sees me walk in he smiles, "Hey Milly."

"Hi Cal," I mumble as I sit down beside Ash on my stool.

"You okay babe?" Michael asks, concern lacing his voice.

"I'm fine," I say as I put a fake smile on, but I can tell Ashton doesn't buy it.

I'm so so so so so so so so so so sorry for leaving you guys for like 10 million billion years. I feel really bad and I'm sorry :(

Hopefully you guys will forgive me :D

Ummmm, oh yeah.

OMFG!!! 15 THOUSAND READS!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

WHAT EVEN IS LIFE?!?!?! IEUhfiouw2quehoidhnqowhdohdbvehlawdoihfdofjej.

Okay I'm done. But thank you guys so so so so much. It means so much to me. You don't even know.

Also, I'm thinking about doing a TwitCam to answer a few of your questions that you might have about the book or about the characters. I'll even answer questions about myself. Just I need to know how many of you would watch it. Can you please comment if you would watch it?? :D

And my Twitter is @Tanna_Jordan If you do go over there and follow me, you don't have to, maybe just shoot me a Tweet with the hashtag #DMTwitCam and tag me in. I'll follow you back and this is also another way for me to know who might watch it :D

ILYSM!

SWAG ON!

~ TJ xoxoxoxo