I'll Save You - Spirk

Chapter Twenty Six

A/N
Hello! Thanks for your opinions on the last chapter - Fluff and feels it is!

*Jim's POV*

Why am I so stupid? I really shouldn't have pried.

I listened silently, numb with horror as Spock told me about the mental, physical and sexual abuse he suffered at the hands of the Vulcan boy, Stonn.

He didn't go into detail but both his voice and the expression on his face clearly stated how mentally scarred he was, I could have quite happily hunted down and ripped this Stonn person apart for hurting him.

Spock grew even more distressed as he explained his nightmare, how I was going to rape him before turning into Stonn.

No wonder he didn't want me near him.

"Spock" I said quietly when he finished speaking.

He looked up, his eyes sad and still wet with the tears that he was desperately trying to hold in.

"I-I don't know what to say" I finished miserably "really, I would never - not if you didn't -" I choked up and couldn't finish.

He hesitated but then nodded slowly "I know you wouldn't". Despite his words he still sounded unsure.

"That's not all." It wasn't a question. There was something in his eyes, something that said there was something else that he was keeping from me, something major.

He avoided my gaze and picked at the edge of his blanket. "I do not know what you want"

I tilted my head, confused. "What do you mean, what I want?"

He went slightly green and when he spoke his words flowed together with their speed. "I do not know, I guess I thought that you were interested in me as more then a friend, but you didn't actually say anything and you barely touched me. I know humans hug their friends all the time so now I don't know what you want" he explained and hung his head, looking like he wanted nothing more then for the floor to open up and swallow him.

"Oh Spock" I sighed, glad that it was this, rather then something horrible like what we were talking about before.

I moved closer to him and put my arm around his shoulder. "Spock, believe me, I am interested in you as more then a friend" It hurt how surprised he looked at this but I ploughed on, "I know how Vulcans are about touching and I didn't want to make you uncomfortable. I'm sorry, I didn't realise you would see it as a rejection."

"Oh" he replied, going even greener. Thankfully this answer seemed to have taken a weight off his shoulders, although he was still clearly shaken he was looking a lot better.

He shifted so that he was leaning against me and I pulled him closer.

"So this is okay?" I asked as he put his head on my shoulder. "This is okay" he confirmed, then was silent for a minute while he gathered his thoughts.

"It's not so much that Vulcans dislike touch, it's more that we are more sensitive to it then other species. Public affection is frowned upon because it is seen as emotional, however in private Vulcan mates are quite, as humans would say, 'touchy feely', touch is comforting therefore sought after. For Vulcans there is no physical contact between people who are not romantically involved, because our sensitivity makes it too intimate. If we keep whatever this is between us up, I should warn you that I may appear very clingy. You should also know that I don't share" he growled the last bit and wound his arms around me possessively.

It took a moment for me to absorb all this. "I would very much like to keep 'whatever this is between us' up" I quoted him with a smile, unable to deny to myself how much his possessiveness turned me on.

He tightened his grip on me, which I took as an agreement. Or maybes he's just cold.

"So, what are we Spock? Are you my boyfriend? Or do Vulcans have something else?"

"You are my T'hy'la" he stated matter of factly. "Tie-la?" I must have miss heard him.

"T'hy'la" he repeated slowly "it is a very rare bond that few Vulcans have the pleasure of experiencing, I realised the first time I ever saw you, in the library"

"Is that why I felt so weird around you? Like, comforted and a weird ass energy? Huh, that's weird, I never really notice it anymore, I must have gotten used to it" I thought aloud, subtly trying to adjust the blanket to make him warmer.

"Yes, that was the bond" he said, yawning and repressing another shiver.

"How long were you outside?" I asked him in concern, I hope he hasn't gotten sick or something.

"A few hours" he yawned again.

"Alright, come on" I moved away from him and got into his bed, holding my arms open invitingly.

He stood up and neatly folded his blanket, placing it carefully on his desk before slipping in next to me.

He lay one arm over my stomach and put his head on my chest carefully before taking a deep breath and snuggling closer.

"Goodnight Spock"

"Goodnight T'hy'la"