I'll Save You - Spirk

Chapter Sixty Four

*Spock's POV*

Spock,

I believe it is time you and I have a little chat.

I felt my heart rate increasing and quickly found a quiet corner to sit down in.

What do you want?
-Spock

Jim. He is mine, he always has been, and he always will be. I want you to stay away from him.

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. Of course.

Another message came through and I opened it with a sigh.

At the moment he is convinced you are his 'true love', or some other bullshit. He is confused, you have to set things right. You have to end your 'relationship', if that's what you're calling it. He will be much happier without you, he hides his feelings well but I can see how much you hold him back. I would be able to take care of him in ways you can't even imagine. If that alone isn't enough to make you let him go, than you are even more selfish than I originally thought. Well, if you need more motivation then so be it. I already have one of his closest friends. Carol Marcus. If you haven't ended things within three days, I will take another. After that one with disappear every day. I regret the amount of suffering it will cause my lovely Jim, but sometimes sacrifices must be made. I do hope you care about him enough to minimise his suffering. If you tell anyone, well, lets just say I have access to guest housing. Including the temporary housing of Ambassador Sarek and his lovely wife, Lady Amanda Greyson. I could of course simply take Jim by force, he would have the rest of his life to realise his love for me, but I'd rather he comes to me willingly. The thought of forcing him to do something hurts, I don't want to be that kind of partner. Anyway, I'll leave you to your task. Message me when its done, and I will tell you where to meet me. It is unfortunate, but Jim will heal and move on faster if you're not around, so it's really for the best. Think about what is best for Jim, and your family.

I trust you will do what we both know is right.

I felt my stomach dropping and terror rising in me.

I can't leave Jim, I love him, I need him, he is my T'hy'la.

If he lost his friends though..... He would not be able to cope with their losses.

I am not naive enough to believe that my loss would be worse than theirs.

The best thing would be to show him the message, he would know what to do.

We could pretend we were not together anymore, but if they found out..... They probably would, I can not risk my family like that.

Human relationships end, it wouldn't take Jim long to recover and move on. He would be okay.

If his friends were taken and hurt he would blame himself for the rest of his life. He would never fully recover.

I could not be the cause of that pain, but still, how could I possibly leave my T'hy'la?

I bowed my head and screwed my eyes shut, pushing back tears. I would have to, Jim must always come first. Besides they are right, he'll probably be better off without me.

I stood up on shaky legs and double checked the message, I have 3 days. 3 days to be with my T'hy'la before a life alone.

Assuming they let me live of course, they may simply kill me to get me out of the way.

That may be preferable to the alternative. I can never be with another, and watching Jim move on with someone else would certainly kill me.

I wandered home in a daze, ignoring the people around me.

When I reached my place I sat on the bed, burying my face in my hands in despair.

The door opened quietly and Jim walked in.

"Gary's sleeping, are you okay?" Jim's voice went from tired to concerned in an instant as he saw my face.

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

He came over, a tender look on his face.

"It'll be okay, it might take some time but we'll find Carol find the person responsible. Than we'll be okay."

He went to kiss me but I turned my head away, unable to deal with my raging emotions and suddenly unable to face him, knowing what I'm going to do.

"Spock?" Jim questioned, sounding hurt.

"I am tired."

My voice cracked slightly and Jim's eyes widened.

"Spock, what's wrong?"

I avoided his eyes and stood up, going over to the other side of the bed. "I am going to sleep, goodnight Jim."

I climbed under the covers and turned my back to him, screwing my eyes shut as the first tears began leaking out.

"Okay, Spock."

Jim's voice was so soft and tender, so understanding, and it tore me apart.

I felt the bed shift as he lay next to me, but he didn't try to touch me again.

Then the realisation really hit me. This could be one of our last nights together, was this really how I wanted to spend it?

I rolled over and curled up against his side, pressing my face into his neck and curling my fingers around his other shoulder

He shifted and wrapped his arms around me, thankfully not questioning my change in attitude.

"Jim?" I asked softly and he made a noise to indicate he was listening.

"Can you sing for me?"

He shifted again to draw me closer. "Of course." He was quiet for a moment, then his sweet voice was filling the silence.

"I remember tears streaming down your face
When I said, "I'll never let you go."
When all those shadows almost killed your light
I remember you said, "Don't leave me here alone,"
But all that's dead and gone and passed tonight

Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound

Don't you dare look out your window, darling.
Everything's on fire
The war outside our door keeps raging on
Hold onto this lullaby
Even when the music's gone
Gone

Just close your eyes
The sun is going down
You'll be alright
No one can hurt you now
Come morning light
You and I'll be safe and sound "

My last thought as I drifted off to sleep was at least I have a chance. A chance to get back at them, if they meet with me I could perhaps do something to alert Captain Pike of their identity.

Or.... Could I even bring myself to kill them?

A/N
The song in this chapter is Safe And Sound, by Taylor Swift.