I'll Save You - Spirk

Chapter Twenty Seven

*Spocks POV*

Jim was still sleeping when I woke for the second time that morning.

I propped myself up on one elbow and took the opportunity to examine him thoroughly.

His hair was messier then usual and his mouth was slightly open, he wasn't snoring exactly but I could hear him breathing deeply, it was..... Adorable.

A frown crossed his face and I immediately tensed up, is he having a nightmare? Should I wake him?

Before I could decide he turned so that he was on his side, facing me. One of his arms stretched out and felt around until it reached where I had moved to.

The frown was replaced with a smile and he snaked his arm around my waist and shuffled closer, still fast asleep.

My heart stuttered and I felt an illogical grin breaking out.

A strip of skin caught my attention and I looked down to where his shirt had ridden up. I reached my hand out without thinking and ran my fingers over it, fascinated by its smoothness.

Jim had no scars to wreck his body.

I frowned as I thought about my own skin, how can my scarred body even begin to be good enough for someone as perfect as my T'hy'la?

I looked back up to Jim's face and was startled to see his electric blue eyes looking softly down at me.

"Sorry" I muttered and pulled my hand away. "I'm not complaining" he laughed and touched my face with the hand that wasn't around my waist.

I frowned in confusion, maybe he forgot how ugly my scars are, maybe he forgot they were even there.

"Why are you doubting me again?" he sighed, letting his hand drop.

I didn't even question how he knew what I was thinking about. I looked down at his stomach again and touched the smooth skin reverently for a second before withdrawing from him and sitting up.

"You're perfect" I said unhappily "how can you want me?"

I looked away and tried to keep myself together, how does this human manage to break down all my barriers and make me so emotional?

He sat up too and touched my hand. "You're perfect to me" he said tenderly. "Maybe someday you will believe me, although I'm terrified someday you will decide you want another Vulcan rather then an emotional human like myself"

I opened my mouth to protest but he continued before I could. "I don't care about your past, it made you who you are and I wouldn't change any part of you."

He looked down and lifted my shirt slightly, running his gentle fingers over the ridges of some scars.

I looked up to see him looking at me again. "You're perfect" he repeated quietly.

He still had his hand on my stomach and I could feel his sincerity through the bond, I leaned towards him and kissed him desperately, my lips seeking reassurance.

He cupped my face and kissed me back gently, pulling away too soon.

"You have to go" I guessed, not at all happy. He stroked my hair "Bones will be wondering where I am and despite what we want, we do have to go back to our lives eventually."

I nodded and he stood up, stretching. "Before I go" he hesitated as if he wasn't sure if he should continue or not. "Could I check something?" He sounded nervous.

I stood up, confused "of course"

He took an unsure step forward and touched my face briefly before lifting my shirt.

I was confused and very self-conscious but didn't try to stop him as he examined my stomach and chest.

He finished and let my shirt drop, looking sad but also determined. "Now I will know if you cut again" he explained.

I nodded, although I am 96.3% sure that I will disappoint him, most likely multiple times.

"I'll message you after I talk to Bones, maybe we could go somewhere?" He looked hopeful.

"That would be agreeable" I replied.

He gave me a dazzling smile and stepped forward to give me a light kiss on the cheek.

"See ya soon!" he called back as he bounced out of the room.

I already felt lost without his bright presence filling the space.

I tried not to dwell over it as I carefully made the bed (and if anyone ever asked I would certainly denying picking up the pillow Jim had used, and burying my face in it to smell his lingering scent) and put away the blanket Jim had wrapped around me much earlier this morning.

With my room back to the tidy standard that I usually kept it in I sighed and resigned myself to the tactical training assignment I had yet to complete.

................

Approximately 2 hours after Jim left I received a message on my PADD.

Meet me at the coffee shop in 5?

I pushed the sense of elation at his message down and sent my response only seconds later.

I shall be there.

Awesome! See u soon xx

I frowned in confusion

What does xx mean? Is it some form of code that I am unaware of?

HAHAHA oh Spock an x is like sending a hug so I was sending u two hugs

That is illogical as I cannot experience a hug through message. And, hypothetically, if I could, one hug would have been adequate.

Damn ur so romantic Spock ;)

I frowned, getting the feeling that he was laughing at me. I decided it did not warrant a reply.