Toxic Love [COMPLETED]

Epilogue

Hindi ako makapaniwala na pagkatapos ng lahat ng nangyari sa buhay ko ay makakahanap pa rin ako ng kasiyahan.

Noong mga oras na nawasak ang puso ko ay pakiramdam ko katapusan na ng mundo.

Parang dati, noong unang beses na nangyari iyon ay halos hindi na ako makakain ng na'sa oras. Parang ang hirap na lang gawin ng lahat kahit iyong mga pinaka-simpleng bagay. I thought it was the end of me pero too nga iyong sinasabi ng sikat na saying which goes "Everything heals in time."

Napatunayan ko 'yan.

I can't turn back time to right all my wrongs but the most important thing is I learned something, at least I can say that I've truly lived my life and that's the  essence of  living, making all your mistake as a lesson.

It's just a matter of perspective, really. If you treat your wrong doings as a negative experience you won't truly be happy but if only you open your eyes, you'll see that it is not such a thing but rather an experience full of lessons and opportunities that will make you a much smarter and better individual.

Acceptance is the key to everything, as long as alam mo sa sarili mo na hindi naman lahat ng gusto mo ay mangyayari, you''ll find and find your happiness. At saan nagsisimula 'yon? Sa sarili mo, only you, yourself can change your life. 

It's been a year since I thought my life was over, it's been a year since my secret about Alisha was revealed, it's been a year but it already felt like decade, how can I grow so much as a person in just a year? Sometimes, I don't even know myself anymore. 

I smiled when I saw Andrew's glowing face all of the sudden, naglalakad siya papunta sa'kin ngayon, sa likod niya ay ang sumisikat na araw, ang araw na maikukumpara ko sa kanya. Minsan ay sumasagi sa isip ko na nasaan na kaya ako ngayon without him? He is my sun, he makes me shine.

Siya iyong tao na hindi nagkaila na tulungan ako at mahalin ako kung sino ako, siya rin ang dahilan kung bakit tanggap ko na ang lahat at kung bakit masasabi ko nang totoong masaya ako. I was always self-conscious, lagi ko na lang iniisip 'yong sasabihin ng iba at lagi kong dinadamdam iyong masasamang sinasabi sa akin. Tinatanggap ko lahat, naniniwala ako sa sinasabi ng ibang tao, kaya naman noong sinaktan ako ng lalaking mahal ko ay sinisi ko ang lahat sa'kin. 

Lagi ko na lang sinisisi ang sarili ko, it's always my fault not his... Andrew made me realized that if he truly loved me, he'll accept even the negative side of me, hindi niya ako bibitawan ng ganoon lang. After all of our struggle to be together? Dapat lang na maging mapagpatawad siya, if he really wants to be with me.

Masakit noong binitawan niya ako pero doon ay natutunan ko ang 'self-love' na hindi ko napapansin na matagal ko na palang pinagkait sa sarili ko. 

"Thanks Andrew." Madamdamin kong wika ng umupo siya sa harapan kong upuan, we're actually in a Restaurant, nandito kami sa labas tulad ng marami pang customer to enjoy the sunrise and the view. I don't know why I am so dramatic today but maybe because I'm here in Bora-Bora at marami akong ala-ala dito. 

Bigla na lang akong nagising kanina at 'di na ko makatulog kaya napagdesisyunan kong pumunta dito sa pinakauna kong Restaurant na nakita. 

"For what?" Nagtatakang tanong nito at ininom 'yong kape kong malamig na dahil isang oras na ako dito at hindi ko pa rin iyon ginagalaw. 

"For everything." I smiled sweetly at him. 

"You know that I love you so much right? You are always welcome, my love." I really like how he called me his "love" he always make me feel special and loved. "Wala ka bang in-order na cookies?" Biglang tanong niya.