After Andy (#6 in the 'Outcast' Series)

Chapter 58

Chapter 58:

"Missing you forever; never see your face again,

So many chances and only one was taken,

The end of your life; your mind always in strife,

It's going to take forever and forever is all I have.

Lost your way in life; can't suffer through another day,

Nothing I can say that will take the pain away,

I've got this empty feeling in my heart and it's been tearing my world apart,

Nothing that I do can change the damage that I've done,

It's never getting better.

Now you're gone and I wish that you were coming back,

Wishing that I could turn back time to fix all of those mistakes,

One event is all that it takes and a life is forever lost,

I played my part and your life was the cost.

Lost your way in life; can't suffer through another day,

Nothing I can say that will take the pain away,

I've got this empty feeling in my heart and it's been tearing my world apart,

Nothing that I do can change the damage that I've done,

It's never getting better.

Would anyone miss me when I'm gone?

Truth be told, I'd rather die today; disappear forever,

With everything that they say, I wish this pain would go away,

The countless times I've fucked it up,

I'm never good enough.

Lost your way in life; can't suffer through another day,

Nothing I can say that will take the pain away,

I've got this empty feeling in my heart and it's been tearing my world apart,

Nothing that I do can change the damage that I've done,

It's never getting better."

Matt looked to me, the sadness evident on his face as the crowd stopped singing with him, already having known all the words. Juliet by now was already in tears, but I could see that she was more happy than sad with what Matt had just done, not only for us, but for everyone else that'd known Andy.

I was pretty well speechless; I had no idea what to say and Matt saw that. He just gave me a bit of a smile, getting one in return.

***

"Matt, I really appreciate what you did tonight; thank you," Juliet said as we all stood around at the airport a few hours later, the concert having finished.

It was getting late already and we had about thirty minutes before the flight out to Boston.

"I just thought that I should do something to show that I do still care," Matt said as Valary hung onto him, clearly not wanting him to leave in a few minutes. "At the end of the day, Andy was still my friend as well."

Juliet gave a nod and smiled at him sadly, getting the same look in return. Matt looked to me, speaking again.

"I'm proud of you Ashley," he said as Juliet took my hand, linking her fingers with mine and leaning against me. "You did really well tonight; I think we'll be good for the rest of the tour."

I gave a nod. "Thanks; I'm glad I didn't fuck anything up."

Matt smiled in amusement.

"You wouldn't fuck anything up; would've gotten someone else if I thought you'd mess the entire thing up," he said. "You should be proud of yourself."

I gave a bit of a shrug, not overly fazed by it all. Valary looked at the time on her phone before looking to Matt.

"You boys should get going; don't wanna miss the flight out," she said, Matt returning the look before grabbing his phone out as well.

"Shit; you're right, we need to get going," he said. He put his phone back in his pocket and looked to me. "Let's get going before we're late."

I nodded as he looked to Valary and I switched my gaze to Juliet.

"You call me straight away if anything happens and you need me to come home," I said seriously, Juliet nodding.

"I'll call tomorrow morning to check in with you," she said, making me nod again. "Don't forget to call if you need to talk to me as well, ok? If anything goes wrong I expect one of you to call either me or Valary."

"Note taken and ok," I said, giving her a bit of a smile. "I promise that if anything happens you'll be told as soon as we can get a hold of you."

Juliet smiled back; it was nice to see her more or less happy tonight. I think having Matt dedicate that song to Andy had lifted her spirits a bit and maybe even restored a bit of her faith in Matt.

"Alright, get going," Juliet said, letting me go and gently pushing me in the direction that I needed to go. "Don't be late! Message me when you get there so that I know you made it in one piece. I'll call you tomorrow morning to check in."

"You take care of yourself over the next few weeks!" I called over my shoulder as Matt joined me and we headed in the right direction. "I love you!"

"Love you too Ashley; have a safe trip."

I gave her a quick wave, getting one in return.

"She'll be fine," Matt said as we joined up with the others, Brian looking over upon seeing us. "Val will be with her and she'll take good care of her. She won't let anything happen and I'm sure that one of them will call either you or me if they need to talk about something. Juliet's in good hands Ashley."

"Still gotta have a bit of worry or else you'd think I don't care," I said, making Matt smile a slight bit as we stopped with the others. "But for real, I know Juliet'll be fine, but there's always gonna be that slight doubt that she won't be. I know Valary will look after her so I won't worry as much as I normally do."

"When was the last time you actually had a trip away from home?" Matt asked, looking to me.

I looked at him as I thought, trying to think about when it really was that I'd last gotten out of town.

"That's a really good question," I said, Matt just watching me as he listened. "It was a while ago; probably before Juliet and I got together. I can't even remember where I went."

"Well this should do you good then; though it's business you still get to go out and explore places," Brian said, looking to me as his phone buzzed. Matt and I looked to him. "Like tomorrow; we have the day off tomorrow in Boston, so we'll go do some stuff and getcha out and about."

"Sounds like a plan," I said, Brian nodding and turning his phone off. "You get to be my tour guide."