Shea Butter Baby

Thank U, Next

It's funny how people 'change' and just expect you to forget all the shit that they put you through.  That's where I was, in this exact moment when he literally asked me to be his girlfriend.  I noticed the long pause that I was taking and eventually decided to speak up before things got awkward.

"I don't know what to say." I exhaled, calming my nerves.  "I honestly wasn't expecting this."

"So, is that a yes or a no?" He confusingly asked.

"I think, you don't know what it is that you want if we're being honest.  You're just comfortable being around me because I'm the mother of your child. But, I didn't forget the fact that you literally said out of your mouth that you think 'I'm using you for money which is why I kept Yara'. I didn't fucking forget." I took a swig of my beer before bringing it down to my lap and tapped the glass.

"You're gonna have to try a lot harder than that Donnie. If you really want me, show me. Actions speak louder than words."

He silently nodded and cleared his throat. "You know that the Donnie that you know now is different than the Donnie you met a few months ago, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah, of course I know that and I can see you've improved slightly but we literally just started being friends and I really like this space that we're in right now."

Ironically Biz Markie's 'Just a Friend' started playing throughout the club.

"Well then since you just rejected me, let's at least just build as friends and see where things go?" Donnie suggested.

"I'd like that." I smiled and patted his chest.

"How about friends with benefits?" He smirked, revealing his precious dimples and pearly white teeth.

I laughed at him and playfully hit his chest. "No? Okay then." He quickly shot down.

"Adonis...." I dragged. "Fine, we can do the whole friends with benefits thing. Only because I like sex and I like being inclusive to only one partner. We do it on my terms."

He nearly spit out his drink on my outfit and coughed hard to clear his throat. I patted his back to get him together. "Okay, Okay I'm good, thank you." He exhaled. "So, you're serious?"

"Yeah im serious I'm back on my birth control and if you wanna have sex then I'm down." I shrugged. "Let's just be adults about this friends with benefits thing. No feelings, just strictly sex."

Donnie nodded, fully attentive to what I had to say. "No strings attached, just sex." He repeated.

"Bet?"

"Bet." I agreed.

Throughout the night Donnie and I danced, got drunk and enjoyed ourselves into the New Years.  Although is becoming Friends with benefits wasn't his exact plan he was okay with it because I mean what nigga wouldn't be mad at getting sex over a relationship? As we were a few minutes away from counting down the New Year, he found me took my hand. 

"I wanna show you something, we've gotta hurry we've got three minutes." he finished his drink and put the empty glass on the bar counter.

As we weaved through the people in the crowd, he led the way, and found a stairwell that led to the balcony of the private area of the club.  He pushed the side see through door aside and asked security if they could guard the see through door.  He dapped up the man that was nearly twice his size, and held the door open for me to go through.  When we finally stopped, we were on the rooftop of the club, where Christmas lights sparkled in the night sky.  

We could hear the excitement coming from inside of the club as the countdown was getting ready to begin. 

"Looks like we've got a minute until the new year." He said as he looked at his watch. 

"This is beautiful, to think that places like this exist."

He placed his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes. 

"It's crazy to meet people everyday but no one tops how beautiful you are.  You have such a beautiful soul, your energy is pure.  It's a shame that it took me over a year to realize that.  But, I want to build and grow with you and Yara.  I'm willing to wait however long it takes until you're ready.  I want to be with you, I need you in my corner Bria."

10...9...8...7

"I've got you, Adonis Creed.  You got me?" I asked as I looked into his eyes. 

6...5....4...3..

"I got you." He responded and cupped my face with his strong hands and pulled me into a kiss. 

Fireworks sounded off as he continued to hold me in his embrace.  I don't know what it was about that kiss, but it was the most powerful thing that I had ever felt in my life.  It bought butterflies to my stomach and tears to my eyes.  When we finally pulled away for air, he pecked my cheeks that were stained with tears and wiped them away. 

"These next few weeks are going to be trying times for us.  There will be some days where you don't even see me at all because I'll be training for my next fight with Drago.  It's not going to be easy but imma get through it.  We'll get through it okay?" He reassured, and watched me nod my head. 

Donnie pulled me into his strong arms as I rested my head against his chest.  We watched the California night sky light up with the exploding colorful fireworks from people who were enjoying this night together, just as we were. 

———

For the rest of the night we danced and took shots together just like two regular friends. A couple of women pulled Donnie away from me as they walked to the dance floor to dance. I stayed at the bar and ordered a couple rounds of shots to keep myself busy while he was away. As I got a light buzz going again, I questioned myself if what I did was the right thing to do, but he didn't seem to mind the rejection when the women started flocking to him when they realized that he was single.  But I couldn't be mad at him, I said that it was okay for us to see other people, we were working on ourselves.

It was getting late and I was feeling not necessarily down, but aggravated at the whole incident.  As I started drinking more, I lost Donnie in the crowd of people.  There were happy couples everywhere surrounding me and I was once again, feeling lonely on New Years. 

My phone buzzed in my hand when I was scrolling through social media and it was a text notification from Donnie saying he went home with two women who were down for a threesome.  He sent me some money via cash app for an Uber and at that point I was ready to go.  While I was still at the bar, I ordered my Uber back to the hotel and called his friend that had Yara to check on her. 

After gathering my things I staggered towards the front door not realizing how drunk I really was until I stood up.  As I reached the car and got in,my mind spaced out completely.  I don't even remember how I ended up at my hotel room but thankfully I made it without any men harassing me or shit going left.  Without even taking off my dress, I crashed onto the bed and blacked out for the night.

Happy New Years to me.