Agent Vermont (Red Vs Blue OC)

Season 6 Episode 17

I watched as Tau followed Simmons trail through his hack. Simmons was pretty good but he needed some cleaning up on his technique, maybe after I reveal my identity to the others I can give him some help on that. He could end up even better at hacking than me, with a little work.

"What're you finding out, Simmons?" Sarge asked.

"Looks like all the Blue records are here, I just don't have the access to delete them. I'm trying to work around that right now." Simmons said.

'Hmmmm.... not a bad technique.' Tau thought as he watched Simmons trail while also finding more unknown information for us. There wasn't much, most of it was under deep lockdown and experimental. Tau was really trying to get around that.

"Ooh, try hacking the mainframe." Grif said like he knew what he was talking about.

'Someone has clearly watched too many movies.' I thought.

"This isn't a mainframe system." Simmons said in shock.

"How 'bout cracking it, would cracking it work?" Grif said, digging himself a deeper hole, much like Sarge did earlier.

"Grif shut up! Stop making suggestions when you have no idea what you're talking about." Simmons said in annoyance.

"Well, if you want help-" Grif began to say.

Simmons cut him off, still typing away on the keyboard, "I don't want help."

"Maybe you should explain what's going on, and I could make an educated suggestion." Grif said like he was actually smart. Idiots.

'Hey, don't forget these idiots are you friends.' Tau pointed out, 'Also, they are good entertainment while you hold your vow of silence till Project Freelancer falls.'

'I know, your right, just sometimes.... sometimes they are so much of idiots I wonder how they have lived long enough to join the sim troops. Also, the fact that Sarge actually participated in the war and came out still living.' I replied.

'Or the amount of records on Tucker bashing Bachlorette parties or harassing women at local bars on a moon a pretty good distance away.' Tau said.

I nearly chuckled, 'Wait, where did you find these?!' I said, thinking of the blackmail I could use again Tucker when we found him and brought him back to the group.

'Among sim trooper profiles. Simmons was a student at a well known college, going on to get his masters degree in mathematics but panicked under the test and failed out.'

'Grif was a legal racer on a small colonized planet where he crashed an expensive vehicle and was kicked out. Sarge ended up killing his entire squad in a battle and was chosen as a sim trooper due to this.'

'Tucker signed up for the sim troopers thinking it was a way to get chicks and wrote so all across the enlistment form.'

'Caboose killed four squads worth of people before signed to the sim troopers.'

'Donut's story doesn't make any sense whatsoever but he redecorated an entire base in pink and all sort of girly things, making the enemy laugh at them, which got him recommended for the sim troopers. Wow, most stories of sim troopers are absolutely nuts.' Tau said, continuing to search.

I tuned back into the conversation right as Grif spoke.

"I find viruses that feature a laughing skull tend to work the best." Grif said.

'What the fuck did I miss?' I thought in amusement.

"Shut the fuck up and let me work!" Simmons said.