Life changes.

Finals.

It’s December so it’s a little chilly but still warmer than other places. Aiden is now four months and Aubrey is two years old.  Finals are around the corner and its stressing and crazy right now. Austin is freaking out because he “forgot” to study all this semester.  Hanna has been really amazing during all of this. She has came by at all times when we have needed to leave to study or go to class early and stays late when we need to stay after. She has been amazing. She is dating the guy Austin set her up with. I met him a week after their first date when I needed her quickly and she came by with him.

FLASHBACK.

I was running around losing it. Aubrey is crying with a screaming cry that is piercing. Aiden is spitting up and crying as well. Austin has a stomach virus and is whining like a kid and puking in a bucket next to the couch. I am running up and down the stairs and around the house like a crazy woman.

I run back upstairs and pick Aiden up as he cries and try to soothe him. I rock him and bounce him. “Please calm down. Please.”  He relaxes some and I change his diaper. I pick him up and hear, “ALLLYYYY!” I kiss Aiden’s head and put him down. “ALLYYYY.” I sigh, “I’M COMING!” I walk into the hallway and look towards my room with a sigh. I haven’t slept in almost a day.

I run back down the stairs and land with a thud. I turn and head into the living room. Aubrey is crying and curled up on her blankets with her dolls. Austin is getting sick in the bucket and comes up whining. “Allyy.” I turn to him and sigh, “Yes Austin.” He lays down, “Water.” I nod and start to head into the kitchen when Aubrey lets out piercing scream. Not even a second later Aiden starts crying again and Austin starts to whine.

I walk into the kitchen and grab a bottle water from the fridge and start into the living room when the three of them just get louder and louder. I see my phone and grab it. I feel myself losing it. I hit the contact and wait. Once I hear the voice I let it all out, “Please come over. Please. I need you…I. I. I cant take this. I need you, I need help. Please come. Please.” I start crying as I sit there on the floor of the kitchen losing my freaking sanity.

I sit there on the floor of the kitchen hearing Aubrey and Aiden crying and Austin whining. I cover my ears and slightly rock myself. I hear the doorbell and get up running to it. I open the door and see Hanna smiling at me. She sees my face and pulls me into a hug, “What’s going on?” I pull away and she hears it all. Aubrey screaming, Aiden crying and Austin whining. “Allyyy.” She shakes her head and looks behind her at the guy, “It may be awhile.” He shrugs and smiles, “I’m okay with that.” I look at her and then him, “Sorry, Ally this is Kent. He is the guy Austin set me up with.” I smile at him and he comes over giving me a quick hug, “I know you, you dance in Austin tours.” He nods and pulls away. “We are here to help.” I smile in appreciation and step aside letting them in the craziness.

Hanna ran to Aubrey and took care of her and her needs. Kent went to Austin and got him a cold rag and a new bucket. He walks into the kitchen and grabs a bottle of water and hands it to Austin along with crackers. I stand there confused and then hear Aiden and walk up the stairs for the first time in hours. I walk into his room and pick him up rocking him. “I’m sorry baby. I know you don’t feel good.” He curls up in my chest and coos as he starts to fall asleep. I rock him some and put him in his crib before sitting in the chair in the corner watching him.