Bad Reputation | S.M.

Chapter 73

I was able to fall asleep for a bit after Shawn calmed me down, but I could tell he was still worried because he stayed up the entire time, stroking my hair lightly with his fingers as he hummed. I didn't want to leave his side, he made me feel safe. All I can see is Mike's face when I closed my eyes, the unhinged and lunatic look he gave me. The face of a maniac. All I could feel were his fingers laced around my neck tightly and it becoming hard to breath. 

I kept my eyes open, staring at Shawn's window that was across the room before I felt his hand go limp on my head. I looked up to see that he had fallen asleep, his mouth open a bit as he rested his head on his pillow. I slowly sat up, moving his hand ever so slightly so I wouldn't wake him up, and brought my knees to my chest. I lifted my arm, touching my neck and flinching because it felt bruised. I felt a tear slide down my cheek and I rested my head on my knees, looking away from Shawn and aimlessly staring at the guitars on his wall.  

Soon, I watched the sun rise through his window, letting a deep breath out of relief that it was no longer dark outside. Shawn shifted in his sleep a bit, his eyes slowly fluttering open as I kept my head on my knees. He furrowed his eyebrows once he saw me, wiping his tired eyes and sitting up.

"Hey baby." He cooed, his face soft as he caressed my head. I closed my eyes at his touch, taking a deep breath in.

"Hey." I softly said and his face softened even more if that were possible. He looked as if it pained him to see me this way. 

"How are you feeling?" He asked and I shrugged. 

"I've been better." I sighed and lifted my head. 

"How about some food?" He offered, rubbing my arm and I shook my head. 

"I'm not hungry." I pursed my lips to the side and he did the same. 

"Some tea? Coffee?" He continued and I just shook my head as he frowned. "A smooch, a hug?" 

I smiled a bit and nodded, receiving a smile from him before he placed a kiss on my cheek and hugged me tightly. 

"Sorry I came all of a sudden." I sighed, holding onto his body, my head resting on his chest as I hugged him.

"Don't be sorry Nicole, I just wish I could do something to help. To make the hurt go away." He let a deep breath out, kissing the top of my head and tightening his grip. We let go of each other and he cupped my face with his hands as I rested my hands on my lap. "Everything will sort itself out, you'll see."

"I hope." I gave a fake smile, trying to reassure him that I had some sort of hope. He kissed me with emotion, his lips on mine for a while before I hugged him once more. "I have to go home soon, my mom is probably worried." 

"Do you want me to drive you?" He suggested and I shook my head, letting go of him so I could look at him. 

"No, it's okay, thank you." I rested my hand on his thigh. I got up from the bed and he did the same, running his hands through his hair as he walked me out. We made it downstairs to his front door, hand in hand, as I turned to say goodbye. 

"Just call me if you need anything, really." He sighed, not wanting me to go. 

"I will, thank you, I mean it Shawn. Thank you for your comfort, your care, and your love." I could feel myself tear up again, feeling completely emotional, but I quickly shook it off. 

"I just love you so much Nicole." He smiled and brought me in for a hug before placing a sweet kiss on my lips. 

We finally said goodbye and he waved at me from his door as I drove away, silence filling the air, and my windows down so the cold wind could blow on my face. I was frustrated, stressed even. Without a job I can't provide as much as before and I can't help my mom. One job won't be enough for the four of us and I don't want my mom to pick up extra shifts.