What It's Like Being A Sunflower

Chapter 34- To Seattle

Songs: Right now- One direction
What about us- Pink
All I want- Olivia Rodrigo
Hands- ORKID
Questions- Camila Cabello

Chapter 34- To Seattle

Two weeks.

Two weeks later after the birthday party.

And two weeks later after that unforgettable kiss with Adrian.

Ever since, I've been at school with Adrian ignoring me and not even glancing in my direction. I had tried multiple of times to grab his attention, but he walked away like I was invisible, like I was a stranger, like it was before I came into his life ...

I even witnessed him eating Trisha face, with their hands all over each other last week against the lockers. It felt as if someone pressed a scorching hot iron against my bare skin.

I just didn't understand why.

Why was he doing this to me?

He couldn't stand Trisha before, and he kissed me two weeks ago.

And then he decided to kiss another girl right in front of my eyes, especially knowing that I highly disliked Trisha. Was he trying to make me jealous? What did I do to deserve this much torture? I had soo many questions layered in my head yet I stayed quiet.

Elliot and Andre didn't hangout with us either. I could sense that they wanted to from the glances they sent us, and the text messages I received asking if I was okay. Even Elliot stopped sending me random selfies or funny messages like before. Nor could Vivian see him at school, they mostly hung out after school. Neither did I see Andre flirt with a girl or act like his cocky self. I guess this change affected us differently individually.

As for me ... I was the same girl I always was. Worthless and useless.

Everyday that passed with Adrian ignoring me, I raced home and locked myself in my bedroom, breaking down into tears. Vivian tried consoling me by offering me some Ben & Jerry's which would usually help in a situation like this, but it didn't. Dad tried to comfort me by attempting to drift my mind off Adrian with some of our favourite TV shows, but that didn't help either. I hibernated into depression mode, locking myself in my room with not a peak of light streaming through my blinds. So yeah, I became that stupid vulnerable girl who was weeping every second, just because her crush wasn't talking to her. Amazing, right?

The only emotion I felt was sorrow, I didn't want to be friends with anyone nor socialise. I would be safer, it would easier to be alone with no one on your case. And most of all, you would never know how it'd feel to lose someone.

I laid flat on my bed staring up at the paper cranes that dangled from my ceiling. Even Secret Crane stopped delivering cranes. The last two I received was before Adrians birthday. After that, they never returned.

I just wanted to ask the unknown person why. Why stop? Why now when I needed the person the most? When I needed to be excited about at least something about the day, and the quotes to motivate me through the night.

I'd never be able to find out who he or she was.

And I'd probably never see those cranes ever again ...

I attempted to lift myself up from my cosy bed with Reese besides me, keeping me company. But this was the worst I had ever been. My head ached from the impact Nolan caused yet again. He forced himself inside my house a couple of days ago, drunk, while dad was at work. I failed to slam the door in his face as he was too strong, kicking it open. He battered me up without any remarks thrown at me. I only earned half the abuse. He struck my head against the radiator, triggering my head to bleed, and I received fresh wounds added after I had just healed. It was like he was waiting for me to recover so he could beat me up again and again. From the look in his eyes, I could tell he didn't want to kill me, he only needed a wall to puncture his fist into. Though frankly, I rather be dead.