Marthe Woertman Imagines

Bridge

⚠️Trigger Warning ⚠️

I've come to the same ledge for 3 days now just sitting here and listening to my music. My plan was always the same but I could never have enough courage to actually walk off into the rough waters below. Life has been dull for years I've never been able to figure out what I would do next. I didn't really want to die..I just wanted the pain to go away. I've never started to self harm afraid of anyone finding my scars. I'm actually surprised I've been able to hide all my feelings from everyone I know. I've mastered the perfect fake smile and so far have been lucky to not breakdown at the worst times. I guess life wasn't all that bad but I still feel suffocated none the less. And like every day now I would come to this same bridge and sit in this same spot and just listen to music and look down at the dark waters below me. If I would jump or fall off I would surely drown in no time. 3 days in a row I've come here with the decision to die but all three days I've walked home like nothing ever happened. Today however, today was different because all those days if anyone would walk pass me they would either not notice me or they would continue walking not giving me a second glance. But today when I was staring at water below me when I felt someone tap on my shoulder, I jump not expecting anyone and almost fall into the water. I scream but the person who tapped my shoulder grabbed onto my shoulder and pulls me towards them. When I catch my breath and my heart slows down I look at the person who caught me in shock. "What are you doing so close to the edge if your so afraid of death?" She asks. "Because I don't want to die..but at the same time I do..?" I say not making sense at all. A few moments of silence later I ask "So what are you doing out so late?" I ask knowing it was an ungodly hour in the AM. "Couldn't really sleep so I decided to go on a walk." She says. "Wanna sit with me? But maybe not THAT close to the edge?" I ask moving to one side making space for her. "Um sure.." She says slowly climbing up to sit with me. She then crawls over to look down and quickly moves away from then edge. "How the heck do you sit so close to the edge and look so calmly at that?!" She asks scared of the tough waters below. "Well when you become quite numb to everything you become less scared." I then look over at the waters below, "I was afraid earlier because it felt too sudden if I had fallen, I feel like I would have been calmer if I decided to walk or jump off myself, at my own time ya know?" I say as if it was a normal thing to say. But when I look away from the waters and at her face she's shocked and looks teary eyed. I give her a shocked face not realising she might not have understood what I meant. "Um sorry..I've felt like this for a while I'm kinda used to it." As both of us look at each other for a while with my music playing in the background. We then both notice the orange colour of the sunrise on each other's face so we both look into the distance of the water and see the sun rising. I've always got a small bit of happiness seeing sunrises and sunsets they gave me just a little bit of hope. I smiled a small smile at the sunrise. In the corner of my eye I see her looking at me with a gleam in her eye. "Hey wanna go get some breakfast?" She asks. I shrug and say "Yea why not." We both get off the ledge and walk off to a small cafe. "I'm Marthe by the way." She says as we start our walk. I look over at her and say "I'm Y/N"