Oneshots / Head Cannons

Damn demon's.

This is a AU were Tomura and Dabi are demons, I'm just a 'normal' highschool kid who summons them

My  POV
I'm so board ,I could call Toga or twice , naw I'll just watch t.v. I was watching a show about witchcraft and deities "that's pretty cool,I could try that and be a mother fuckin warlock " I said out loud . So I went and did research on my computer
About 15 hours later
"I'll need to go to the library and get these B/n B/n and B/n" (book name) I jumped up from the couch grabbed my keys and put my shoes on and left to the closest library.
I got to the library and checked out my books, then I went to get chalk, candles and a new lighter,I might have took something's that the store won't miss and went back home to try a spell out. I flipped through the books and found a spell to summon a demon? Hmm, "Tœmüra and Dæbi,that who I can summon,......... I'll try it, it says there friendly-ish" I opened the book to the right page "oh great it's page 69" I cleared my living room, (Literally a love seat a tv and a small table) and drew a big pentagram on the wood with five signs on each point and candles all around it "alright,next I need a piece of my self, oh so blood, hair, finger nails... Cum" "I'll do two of them" I wrote them down and pointed to two random ones. Cum and Blood, after I did the deed I cut my finger and put some in a small jar with the *AhEm stuff "alright now I need to put them in the middle but don't step on the lines or blow out a candle, easy enough" I stepped in and put the two small jars in the middle "now to kneel down and recite the words" I knelt down and repeated the words from the book
"I now welcome tœmüra and dæbi into my home to bring happiness love wellbeing and protection, Please here me and grant my wishes" I looked up to see.... Nothing the most that happened was the very top candle went out "aww it didn't do anything, that's disappointing" I got up blew the candles out (I kept the book open!) And went to bed in the clothes I had on (oversized light blue band tee and  fishnets)
(I was wearing jeans all day so I just took them off when i got home) I slept a dreamless sleep
Around 7:26 AM
"What the hell they summoned us with blood and, IS THAT CUM?" A unknown voice said "blood is common but cum? They must be slutty, I like it" a different voice said
"I-i must be hearing things, yeah I'm just hearing thing" I went back to sleep trying to forget what I just heard,
3rd POV
About 10:37 Am
Milo woke up to loud arguing
"OH MY SATAN STOP EATING THE MORTALS FOOD!"
"NO IM HUNGY AND THEY HAVE CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES,SO KINDLY GET FUCKED" he crept into his kitchen  and saw two very large... Things (the picture above,with normal legs)
He peeked back in and quickly hid behind the wall, But not fast enough one of the demons saw him "wait tœmüra, what /who is that?" (Dabis eating cookies while facing tomura , tomura has his back to the hallway)
Tomura turned to the hallway to see a ear? "Go see who it is dip shit" Tœmüra said looking to the other. "Ugh fine" Dæbi walked towards the hallway "come on out we won't hurt you, unless you want us too~"
"DÆBI, STOP TRYING TO FLIRT" . Milo barley thought and he stepped out from behind the wall "dammit why did I do that" he thought "are you the one that summoned us with cum?" Tomura said confused "obviously, crusty" "So, what's your name pretty little thing" Milo froze he didn't know why he was able to banish the.if he wanted "i-im milo" he said softly and looking down "damn she's kinda cute" Dæbi said
"HEY, I'm a boy!" Milo yelled but immediately blushed of embarrassment and looked down "oh he talked" Tomura said "I think he's angry at you ashtray" that's when he noticed that the boy Milo wasn't wearing pants, "are you wearing pants!?" Milo just shook his head indicating a 'No' "so why did you summon us?" Dabi said
"I honestly don't know why" Milo said looking up "I was board"
"Oh cool" Dæbi said going back to eating the cookies " you know were demons right?" Tomura stated
"Y-yeah, Can you PLEASE stop eating my cookies"
"Why~, what are going to do about it~"
"I could banish you, or~ something else~"
"What is that something else~" milo slowly started walking to the 8ft man "this~" he walked up. The demon was blushing and looking at Tœmüra and he just shrugged. Milo kicked Dæbi in the balls "I'll do that" he grabbed the cookies and put one in his mouth and smirked as the demon doubled over groaning in pain "pfftt, you got bestest by a , what 5'0, mortal"
"I'm 5'3 thank you very much, and I honestly  thought that you didn't have a dick"
"O-OF COURSE I HAVE A DICK"
"Its not that big,but he has one"
By then both tomura and Milo were on the floor cackling . After about 5 minutes of laughter
"Does it still hurt?"
"What helps heat or cold?"
"Have you never been kicked in the balls before?" Tomura questioned
"No?"
"HOW!?"
"I just never have,"
"Every dude has been kicked in the balls before" Dæbi said standing
"Well I don't have balls-" he cut himself off "damn, did you lose them,like In a accident" Dæbi asked
"No, i-im trans female to male, I don't have male genitals"
"Damn" the both said "okay so like why did you need us?" Tomura asked "yeah I really don't know,why I did"
*Ring ring ring* Milos phone rang "what was that!?"Dæbi asked startled he looked down to his phone it was toga "ok I need you to not talk for now, Please" and with that he picked up
T: Hey miloooo, how are you
M: I'm....alive ,you?
T: IM FANTASTIC,
T:oh I'm out side of your apartment complex
M:WHY?
T: what can I not see ma best fren
" What is he talking about?"
"I don't know I'm going to explore the place" Dæbi said "I'm just going to sit on the couch" Tomura said walking over to the living room
T:I'm almost to the door
M:o-okay , see you soon, baiii
T:baiiiii
"okay where are you guys"
"Oh I'm on the couch"
"Oh that reminds me, what are your names?"
"Oh I'm Tœmüra Shïgærækï"
" I'm Dæbi" he said appearing behind milo "eek, o-ok Tomura and Dabi I'm Milo , can you please go into my" he got cut off by Toga knocking on the door "okay you guys need to go into my room and say here" he said wile pushed the two men into his room. "Stay here"
Milo ran to the door and opened it "Hi toga"
"Haiii,who were you talking too before you opened the door?"
" O-oh it's no one, you must be hearing things"
"Are you sure, you know what, forget it " she ran up and jumped on the couch "where are your pants?"
"Oh, I just fell asleep last night with this on and didn't change yet"
"But it's, 12:56"
"Dude stop it you don't know what you'll find"
"Who-" he cut her off
"Yeah,I just didn't feel like it, imma go change now" he practically ran to his room
My POV
"Okay what the fuck?" Dabi was in my closet pulling clothes out and Tomura was sitting on my bed "Dæbi? What are you doing?"
"I was looking around, your small"
"Can you hand me some pants?, Please" he pulled out my black and red ripped jeans "okay, can you get my my black long sleeve shirt with the rose on it?"
"This one?"
"Yes" I  walked to my dresser and grabbed my vanilla spray (idk I actually use vanilla spray.... So yeah)
I started to put on my pants and belt, I was about to pull my shirt off as I saw them both looking at me wide eyed "what? Can you turn around"
The both did as i put on my shirt and sprayed some sent and faced them "okay I need you to first stop going through my stuff and second be quite"
"Aww that's no fun"
"Deal with it ashtray"
I left the room and walked to toga "so what do you want to do"
"Movie night?"
"Sure, I need more cookies thought" I said the other half louder in hopes they would hear it "then let's go to the store" she jumped up and went to the door getting her shoes on. "Okay I need to get my money" I went and got my money "you two stay in here no matter what" I threw my old DS at them and a pair of ear buds and left
At the store
"Ight imma go get what I need, meet you back by the cashier's"
I left "ok so I need enough stuff to feed two large demon people"
I grabbed the biggest pack of monster (like a 38 pack) and went to find the cookies "two packs would be enough" I grabbed two things of popcorn and went to find Toga. She had some strawberries and chocolate "alright time to check out" I said pushing the small cart
Back home
I opened the door to see Dæbi I'm the kitchen with the fridge open, I started wisting trying to set his attention "why are you wisting?" Toga asked "oh I've had this tune stuck in my head for like 3 weeks" I kept wisting as Dabi looked over  and wispered "oh shit" and ran to my room, "alright let's go in"
Toga ran into my living room and jumped on the couch "what movie should we watch?"
"I have some in my room, how about child's play?"
"Oooo, yeah"
I walked to my room "okay what the fuck Dæbi I told you to stay in here"
"I got hungy, and crusty was hogging the DS"
"You- what did you do to my clothes?" My clothes were everywhere some were stretched out and ripped and my bed was a mess "oh ashtray was putting on some of your clothes"
"Oh my god" I turned around and grabbed childs play and left
After the movie
"Bye Toga" I waved to her as she left and went back into my room "YOU TWO" I yelled out
"Yeah?" Dabi answered
"You are going to clean up my room, Tomura, you didn't do anything did you?"
"No it was all him"
"Liar!, He dared me to put on the clothes"
"Well you actually did it... So you have to do the work" I said.
Time skip
I went to the couch and put a blanket on it and put another on the floor " okay you two you're out here"
They both went to be Dæbi in the floor and Tomura on the couch as I went to my freshly clean room and went to bed