Marauders Oneshots

THE MARAUDERS ~ Lipstick

I got the inspiration for this from Pizza bear on Devian art! :) It's WAY better than the one written here so go read it and I sincerely suggest you skip this chapter... for my sake... please...

No relationships here- just some over-dramatic queens

"MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL, PERFECT FACE!"

LIPSTICK

This was it. The prank that would set the boys off. You chuckled in excitement... Merlin you were excited. You decided it would be utterly fabulous to prank the Marauders... with irremovable lipstick. Obviously, you had the serum that would take it off- but you wouldn't tell them that.

You and them had been at each other since the day you met. You were a new student sorted into Gryffindor and they pranked you with a paint bomb as their very first prank on you as a 'welcome gift'. 

So, a few peanut butter, paint, ink, charcoal, twigs, whipped cream, pied, roast dinner pranks-filled years later, this was your prank. Permanent lipstick. 

It was the middle of the night and the boys were fast asleep. You tiptoed to Sir James Potter and did his lips first- it really brought out his skintone!

Next was Pretty Boy Sirius. Merlin, the pink really contrasted and brought out his hair"

After, Mr. Moony. You accidentally applied it messily since his moved and turned over. You still, luckily, didn't wake him up.

Lastly, Pettigrew. You applied it quickly before getting out of their dorm.

The Next Morning

You had woken up a bit earlier and stood outside the door, waiting for the innocent idiots to wake up. You had know idea when they would but you took a logical guess that at least one of them was awake when you heard an oddly feminine scream.

"MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL, PERFECT FACE!" you recognised the voice of Sirius, "How will girls want to get into bed with me when I look like...this?!"

You grinned widely.

You heard the morning voice of James start talking, "Padfoot, what in Godric's left ball sack is wrong? You disturbed my beauty sleep for- OH MY MERLIN WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH SIRIUS BLACK?!"

Sirius gasped before throwing a mirror to James and James shrieked, "I LOOK LIKE A POTIONS FEATURES EXPIRMENT GONE WRONG!! AND WHAT THE MERLIN- PINK IS NOT MY COLOUR! HOW DO I ASK OUT LILYFLOWER WHEN I LOOK LIKE A MUGGLE VOGUE MODEL?!"

"WHY ARE WE SCREAMING?" Peter had woken up as well as Remus and Peter had decided to immediately join this screaming match once waking up.

"PETER, LOOK AT YOUR FACE AND YOU'LL HAVE THE ANSWER!" Sirius screamed back. At this point, you were positive the whole of Gryffindor had woken up and were willing to put your money on the fact Ravenclaw was now awake too.

Remus was just sitting there with a mirror in his hand staring at his reflection. He hadn't uttered a word.

"Remus, you don't care?" asked a wide-eyed Sirius who could no longer shout and had a hoarse voice.

"No, I think it goes perfectly with my new handbag- OF COURSE I BLOODY CARE!" he yelled.

The four boys collapsed on the floor dramatically in tears and you burst out laughing. Unfortunately, you were right outside the door and the boys heard you.

They ran to the door and opened it to find you laughing hysterically on the floor. You looked up at them.

"Nice face, Potter!"

"Oi!" he replied.

"Black, that colour really does compliment your skintone-"

"What?!" he responded.

"Lupin, you're right- it'll go perfectly with your new handbag-"

"Yeah, I'll shove you in my new handbag-" he retorted but stopped when you interrupted.

"And, Merlin, Pettigrew, that colour goes extremely well with your eyes-"

"I swear on Merlin's left buttock, I'm fighting the urge to throw a hard boiled agg at your face-"

If looks could kill, each of the Marauders would have put you six feet undergground- theoretically meaning that, as of the current moment, you should have been twenty-four feet underground.

They each grabbed an arm or a leg of yours and picked you up to drag you into the room. You were still to happy to protest.

They plopped you carelessly on to James' bed and all started screaming, once again, at you all at the same time.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! I HAD A SEGGS DATE WITH A HOT RAVENCLAW-!"

"HOW IN GODRIC'S GRAVE AM I SUPPOSED TO GET GIRLS?!"

"BECAUSE OF YOU, I'M GONNA DIE COLD AND ALONE-"

"I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY!"

"That I am," you finally stopped them from yelling.

You all stopped talking when the door burst open, "What in Godric Gryffindor is going on?"

McGonagall had walked in, her hair messy and down as well as being dressed in a night gown.

"Minnie, look what she did to my gorgeous face!"

"Oh, Minnie, you must fix this!"

"Minerva McGonagall, I shall hereby declare you as my favourite teacher if you amend this!" 

"I just wanted breakfast!"

McGonagall rolled her eyes, "Oh, will you shut it?"

She turned to you, the slightest smile playing on her lips, "Ten points to Gryffindor."

"MINNIE!"

"TRAITOR!"

"THE BETRAYAL IS TOO MUCH TO BARE!"

"UHM, DEFNINTELY NOT MY FAVOURITE TEACHER!"

She tutted, "Okay, then. Ten points from Gryffindor-"

"NOOOO!"

I apologise dearly for this but do not claim responsibility for damaged electronics if you hurled your across the room whilst ready this :) Terms & Condition apply