Queen Bee

April 2004 (1)

It was around the middle of April and things have been... Absolutely fuckin' horrible. I miss Angel more than words can even describe and I really just don't know what to even fuckin' do with myself anymore. We've started trading Des off each week like I do with Kim since if we're really fuckin' done, and she ain't ever comin' back, then we may as well start figurin' out a custody agreement so I ain't have to keep goin' over to Denaun's everyday. It sucked when Angel suggested it, but fuck, what else can I do? I've tried everything with her at this point. I've begged her to come back, I've promised I'll be better, but nothing. She's not interested anymore. She's tryna move on now and that's what hurts me more than anything. How can she just move on from us? From me? From our family? How could she ever give up on that? I know I never could, that's why no matter how bad things got between us, I still stayed. I stayed 'cause I love her. 'Cause I need her. But it turns out, that was always just a one way street. It was never reciprocated... And I just don't know what to do with that information. 

The only thing that's given me even a little glimmer of hope though, is that she texted me a few days ago asking if she could come over and we could talk for a bit. Immediately, I jumped on the opportunity, realizing now this might be my only chance to get her back. Before, she was never interested in talking again after the night I just randomly showed up. She kept saying everything's already been said and she's made her decision. But this time, she reached out to me, asking me to talk. Maybe she's starting to feel the hurt too. Maybe she's starting to realize she needed me more than she thought. God I fuckin' hope so, 'cause I'll tell ya... Getting high in your bed alone while you cry over the woman of your fuckin' dreams basically every goddamn night is not a place anyone ever wants to be. 

Hearing the doorbell ring followed by a few sturdy knocks on the hard wood, I felt my heart sink. I just want this to go well so fuckin' badly, I feel like I'm right back to when I first met her and how intimidated she used to make me feel. And still, not much has even changed, I want her just as bad now as I did back then. 

Sauntering over, I unlocked the door, gently swinging it open to reveal the most beautiful fuckin' woman I swear I've ever laid eyes on. She didn't even look anything out of the norm, all she was wearing was her favourite low rise jeans, a grey, long sleeved shirt with a few buttons undone showing off her signature cleavage, and loose curls flowing all the way from her scalp to her breasts. But still. She looked perfect. 

"Hey." I said nervously. With no response, all she gave was a tight lipped smile, carefully stepping inside as I moved out of the way for her. "You still have ya key, right? You know ya could just come in." 

Gifting me another clearly uncomfortable smile, she looked up at me. "I don't live here anymore, Marshall." After a few moments of awkward silence, she tore her eyes away from mine, and slowly began heading down the hallway. 

Following her lead, I trailed a few seconds behind her, once again in nothing but an anxiety inducing silence. "So... Whaddup? What's goin' on?" I asked as she parked herself against the large kitchen island. 

"I needa talk to you 'bout somethin'." Planting her purse on the counter, she began pulling out a thick stack of papers. 

Nodding, I moved myself in front of her as I leaned over the island, trying to get a better look at what the hell she had brought with her. "Which is what? What're those?" 

Bringing her gaze back towards me, she sighed. "I wanna move back to Brooklyn." 

Immediately, my eyes grew wide. "WHAT?! Nah! Nah! No, you ain't fuckin' movin' back to Brooklyn! Why the fuck would ya go back there?!" 

"So I can be with my family, Marshall!" She yelled back desperately.

"I'm ya fuckin' family!"

"No." She shook her head. "You're not."

"Nah?! So ya just had a kid with a fuckin' random?!" I yelled again sarcastically. 

She shrugged. "That's what it feels like somedays." 

"Nah, Angel! Ya outta ya goddamn mind! You really fuckin' think I'ma let ya take Des outta state?! All the way to fuckin' New York?!" 

"No, Marshall, I don't. That's why I got an official custody agreement written up." She said, sliding the stack of papers towards me.

"What the fuck we needa custody agreement for?! We've been doin' just fine figurin' it out on our own!" 

"'Cause I'm movin' back home whether you like it or not, but I ain't tryna take ya son away from you." 

"Nah?! Then what the fuck is this that ya doin' right now?!" 

"I need to move back home for me, Marshall! I hate Detroit and I needa be with my family-" 

"You hate Detroit?! Since fuckin' when?! You ain't never said ONCE that you hated Detroit!" 

"Since I decided I ain't wanna fuckin' be here anymore!" 

"Nah, you just ain't wanna be 'round ME anymore!" 

Rolling her eyes, she sighed once more. "Look. I'm tryna make this as painless as possible. I'm proposin' Des gets one month with you, and one month with me-"

"A month?! You really want a fuckin' two year old flyin' 'round on planes once a month?!"

"WELL THEN GIVE ME ANOTHER OPTION, MARSHALL!" She screamed. 

"STAY! STOP THIS SHIT AND FUCKIN' COME HOME!" 

"GO TO REHAB!" 

Letting out an incredibly loud and angry yell, I quickly stomped my way towards her, my hands flying to both of her cheeks as I roughly pulled her in close. "Listen to me, Angel. I ain't fuckin' goin' to rehab. Not now, not ever. So just shut the fuck up about it, and be with me. Don't throw away what the fuck we have over ya dumb ass obsession with these fuckin' pills." 

Gently shaking her head, she began pulling away from my grip. "Fuck off, Marshall. I'm done." Tightening my hold around her face, I quickly yanked her back towards me, my lips immediately flying to hers. Obviously confused at first, she let out a few quiet grunts into my mouth as she pulled her head back slightly, but only moments later, I felt as she started to settle in. Slowly, her lips began to melt against mine, and she quickly moved her arms to around my neck, creating a tight hold as my hands flew towards her jeans. 

Unbuttoning them as fast as I could, I yanked them down to around her thighs just before turning her around, swiftly lifting her up, and placing her down onto the counter. As our swollen lips lost contact, neither of us said a word, and my head quickly flew to between her legs. 

As one of her hands eagerly threw itself towards the top of my hair, her other one was placed behind her, firmly holding her up. Her breathing was heavy with anticipation as I roughly gripped her thighs before greedily inhaling her entire wet pussy into my mouth. 

As soon as my tongue made contact, the loudest whine I had heard come from her in awhile filled the entire room, and she tightened her grip on my head. With my wet muscle working frantically, I zeroed in on her clit as I started swiping over it as fast as I could. "Fuck- Marshall-" Her strained voice whined once more. "Marshall- Marshall, sto-" She moaned loudly, cutting herself off. "Stop- Marshall-" She moaned once more, and honestly, I was just so focused on the sweet purring I had missed so much that I wasn't even registering what she was saying. "Marshall, stop!" She yelled as she kicked her foot against my shoulder, forcing me to fall back a few steps. "I ain't wanna do this with you!" Hopping of the ledge, she yanked her jeans back up. 

"What?! Ya ain't want me to eat ya out?! That's fuckin' unheard of!" 

"Just sign the fuckin' documents and send 'em to me!" She yelled again, snatching her purse from the island as she stomped towards the door. "I get possession of my place on the 1st!" 

"You already bought a house?!" I yelled back, my voice echoing down the hallway as I immediately got cut off by the front door slamming shut. She's gotta be fuckin' kidding me?! That bitch is off her goddamn rocker if she thinks I'ma just sign that agreement and let her take my kid across the fuckin' country! I ain't give a fuck if she's already found a place! She better get comfortable in Detroit 'cause that's where the fuck she's stayin'!