Queen Bee

March 2007 (1)

Spraying the kitchen island down with my bleach and water mixture, I had my earbuds plugged into the pink iPod that Aidan had gotten me for Christmas. Swaying my hips back and forth to the sound of Rihanna's Umbrella track, I threw my slightly damp hand towel down, beginning circular motions over the granite countertops as I mopped up the bleach. 

Humming to myself, I couldn't believe how happy I had been feeling over the last little while. It was almost like my mood did a complete 180. I went from being depressed, anti-social, and self-loathing to just waking up every morning feeling so filled with joy, and really just being completely content with my life. I felt like I was thriving, almost as if I were a butterfly who had spent far too long in their cocoon. It took awhile for me to feel like this... A really long while, actually. But now that I finally am, now that I finally feel like my old self, I swear I could take on the world. And I actually want to take on the world. I don't just wanna hide anymore. I wanna live, and let me tell you, I am fucking living. 

"BOO!" Alicia yelled, her hands quickly attaching themselves to my waist as she ran up behind me. Immediately jumping in response, a loud yelp rolled from my lips as I could hear Alicia's signature cackle in my ear. 

"Oh my god!" I laughed, spinning around to face her with my hand clutching my chest. "The fuck is wrong with you?!" 

Continuing to laugh, she wrapped her arms tightly around my waist. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She wheezed. "It's too easy. You're too easy." 

Rolling my eyes, I laughed. "Uh huh." Pulling her head away from my neck after leaving an apologetic kiss, I gently combed my fingers through the ends of her hair flowing effortlessly down her shoulders. "You look pretty, where you goin'?" 

"No, you look pretty." She smiled, planting her lips softly against mine before pulling away from me completely. "I have that meeting today, remember?" 

"Ooh." I nodded, remembering her telling me that last night. "How you feelin'? Are you nervous?" 

"To go fight with my stupid fuckin' label over royalties? Yes. Extremely." 

Offering her an empathetic smile, I reached my palms out for her cheeks. "You're gonna be fine. You can do it. You have your manager there, you have support, you're not doin' it alone. I know you ain't like confrontation, but you gotta stand up for yourself, baby, okay?" 

She sighed. "I know. I just wish you could do it for me. You're better at this stuff." 

Laughing, I planted another small peck against her lips before releasing her cheeks. "Just channel your inner me and go fight a bitch." 

Throwing her head back, she gifted a deep rumble of laughter back to me. "I'll try, baby." 

"Good girl." I smiled, running my hand down the side of her hair. "Okay, I'll see you in a few hours then, yeah?" 

"Sounds good, baby. I love you!" Giving me one last peck, she turned on her heel to make her way towards the front door. 

"I love you too!" I yelled back. 

"Oh!" Stopping in her tracks, she peered around the corner. "And since Des left for Marshall's this morning, you should definitely be naked by the time I get back." 

Bursting into laughter, I turned to her. "Should I?" 

"Yup!" She exclaimed, spinning back on her heel once more as she continued her march towards the door. "I love you, beautiful girl!"

"I love you more!" I yelled back, and with those last few words, I listened as the door creaked open, followed by a solid slam shut as a wide grin painted across my face. Goddamn it, she makes me so fuckin' happy.