Queen Bee

February 2006 (1)

One month. It had been officially been one month since me and Kim got remarried, and we were already divorcing. A few nights ago, we had gotten into a huge fight where she even started smashing my fuckin' dishes! I kicked her out, and still had yet to see or even hear from her since. Well, that was until yesterday, when she came back with nothing but empty cardboard boxes and a large stack of papers, telling me she was filing for divorce. Honestly, I don't even remember what the fuck the fight was about, or how it turned so sour so quickly, but I guess that doesn't matter now anyway. She moved to a hotel for the time being, and once again I'm left all alone in this giant fuckin' house, by yet another bitch who I couldn't make stay. It hurts. And the thought of not even being able to keep Kim around?! That hurts way fuckin' more than I could have ever imagined. Angel is one thing. No one could ever fuckin' keep Angel around, and that's just the reality of who she is. But Kim?! I should be able to keep Kim around easier than anybody! I don't understand it. I don't understand what the fuck is so wrong with me that not even Kim wants to stay married to me! I give these bitches everything just short of my fuckin' soul! What more do they want from me?! I have nothing more left to give! They've taken it all. They've taken everything... And now I'm left with nothing. 

Laying down on my bed in the completely darkened room, I could barely even see the ceiling from the extreme lack of light. The skin of my cheeks felt tight due to the now dried tears, and my eyes were slowly becoming heavy thanks to the cocktail of pills I had taken not even half an hour ago. I felt numb, like someone could pinch me and I wouldn't even flinch. And to be honest, this is the best I've felt all day. The only thing that could make this any better would be if my mattress were to just swallow me up whole, but the pills are doing a pretty good job of that themselves, I guess. 

Just as my eyes were beginning to flutter closed and my mind was almost completely free of any thoughts, a loud ringing coming from the nightstand caused my entire body to be jolted back awake. Flinging my eyes open, I inhaled a rough, annoyed breath as I slowly moved my gaze away from the ceiling, and over towards my cellphone. Watching it ring for a few moments, I debated with myself if I should just ignore it. But after the fifth ring, I figured it wasn't gonna end anytime soon. 

Reaching my arm outwards, I lazily snatched the device from the wooden stand, my eyes immediately falling upon Angel's name. What could this bitch possibly want from me now?! Hitting the talk button, I reluctantly brought the phone towards my ear. "What?" I spat, uninterested. 

"Uh, hello? Marshall?" She asked confused, likely due to my less than positive greeting. 

"Yeah, it's me." I angrily stated. "What the fuck do ya want?"

Scoffing, I could tell she was shaking her head, probably even rolling her eyes if I know Angel. "Look, if this is a bad time-" 

"Yeah, it is a fuckin' bad time, but spit it out since ya felt it was so necessary to call me at fuckin' ten o'clock at night." 

"I was tryna give you some time to get all the kids to bed you fuckin' dick." 

"They ain't here." I stated bitterly. 

"What? Where the fuck is Des?!"

"Nah! Des is here!" I yelled. "The rest of 'em aren't. They're with Kim." 

"Where's Kim?" 

A rough sigh rolled from my lips. "Not that it's any of ya fuckin' business, but we're gettin' divorced." 

"Again?" She asked with slight attitude, and I could tell she was mocking me from the small giggle she had obviously tried to suppress. 

"Nah! Y'know what, Angel?! Fuck you! You're just fuckin' mad 'cause I would never wanna fuckin' marry ya!"