I'm Vine Ft. Kim Taehyung (BTS) {COMPLETED ✔️}

Part Forty-Four 사십사

~ Taehyung ~

I drop myself on the couch and groan. I feel even worse than I ever thought I could feel. I thought I was feeling bad a few days ago, when I realized I was falling for the wrong girl. But now I feel worse than ever. Seeing her in so much pain... It breaks me. I know I deserve it, but it still breaks me...

The moment I told Alyssa about my feelings and my emotions, I hurt her. Of course I knew that. That's why I was dreading that moment for as long as I could. I tried to convince myself that it was all in my head. That I wasn't really falling for Ye-Jun. But day after day, I felt my feelings for her grow... I started to see the things I missed about Alyssa. When I started to notice these things, I started seeing them more and more...

And now look what I've done... The day I told Alyssa, I knew I broke her. I knew she was hurt. And for the first time in our lives, I couldn't help her. For the first time, I was the one hurting her. For years and years I tried everything I could to protect her from all the bad things in the world. Even though it wasn't always possible, I always tried and I made sure I always supported her, no matter what... Until now, I guess...

"Oh hey," Hoseok enters the room holding two shopping bags filled with groceries. I don't even answer him, I just lay my head back on the couch and sigh deeply. I hear how Hoseok puts his bags down. "Are you okay?" He asks me. "Fantastic," I say as sarcastically as I possibly can.

He doesn't say anything and I hear how he cleans up the groceries. I sit up and sigh. "I know, it is my own fault," I say. I know that's what he is thinking. He doesn't look up to me, not correcting me.

My thoughts are racing through my head. All I can think about is Alyssa. Her broken voice in the voice mail, the anger in her eyes, the broken soul I could see through her eyes... Did I really break her? It feels like I did...

I look at Hoseok and feel a lump in my throat. "You were with her last night," I say. It is not a question, because I know it is true. Hoseok turns around to me and looks a little worried. "Yeah?" He carefully says. "H-How was she?" I ask. I feel scared as I ask him.

Hoseok takes a seat next to me and sighs. "What do you want me to say, Tae?" He asks. I feel tears burning in my eyes and look away from him. "Just the truth..." I tell him, "How was she doing?"

"Honestly, Tae, how do you think she is doing?" He asks, "You turned her world upside down out of nowhere..." I can't even look at him. He is right though. Did I really expect her to be doing fine? Of course she isn't fine.

I stand up from the couch and start pacing through the room. "I really fucked up, didn't I?" I bring my hands to my head and pull my hair. I groan and start to get angry. "Taehyung, I think you should calm down," Hoseok tells me.

I groan and ignore him. "Everyone hates me, don't they?" I ask. Hoseok stands up and looks at me. "Taehyung, just calm down. You can't change anything about it now," he tells me. He is right. Of course he is. But I am panicking too much to think clearly.

Then Hoseok stands in front of me and puts his hands on my shoulders to stop me. "Taehyung, look at me," he says. I take a deep breath and look at him. He looks worried. But my mind can't stop. "D-Do you think she will ever forgive me?" I ask him.

Hoseok lets go of me and looks confused. "Already? Well I think she will be mad if you broke it off only to ask for forgiveness only a day later," he says. "Yeah, no, yeah, but I mean, eventually," I tell him. Even though my brain tells me to run back home, beg for her forgiveness, hold her and never let her go again, I know I can't. And I won't. I did all of this for a reason.

"Honestly, Tae, it will take time..." Hoseok says, "But knowing her, knowing you and knowing you as a couple, I think you will figure it out. Eventually." I look at him and feel a lot calmer again. I take a few deep breaths and nod. He is right... There is a chance we will be okay in the end.