Obliviate ; Fred Weasley

Sixty-one

I didn't hear anything the healer said after the word 'miscarriage' left his mouth.

I just turned onto my side, my back to him, but Fred listened, and Angie listened. I just shut my eyes and pressed a hand to my ear.

I didn't want to hear anymore. I didn't want to hear them talk. I didn't want to hear that word again.

Fred held my hand as he stood by the side of my bed. He brushed his thumb over my skin repeatedly, and it felt nice, especially now.

After the healer left, Fred pulled a chair closer and sat down. I opened my eyes and removed my hand from my ear.

He looked at me and his free hand brushed over my hair.

"I'm so sorry, beautiful." He whispered, pressing a kiss to my hand.

His eyes were glossy with tears, his hand continuing to stroke over my hair.

"Did you hear what he said?" He asked softly, but I just stared at him. "You miscarried because..."

He sighed.

"Why?" I whispered. "What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing is wrong with you, Kai." He assured me. "Your eggs aren't very strong. They don't have a very good environment and when that egg evolves into a small embryo, it affects the quality of the embryo as well."

I just stared at him for a moment before shutting my eyes.

"This is exactly why I didn't want to do this again." I whispered. "I can't take it."

Fred leaned in and pressed a kiss to my temple. Then he crawled onto the bed with me, and I let him. His arms wrapped around me, his head resting against mine.

"There're things you can do, you know..." Angie said. "There's IVF. You get hormonal shots to produce more eggs, and then they'll take some eggs and impregnate it with Fred's sperm. After a couple of days, they'll take the best embryos and put them in your uterus. It can be quite helpful."

I shook my head.

"I'm done." I whispered, snuggling against Fred's chest. "But I want a baby so much, but I can't go through this again. It hurts too much."

Fred tightened his grip on me.

"It's okay." He told me. "We have Aaron, yeah? We don't need a second child."

That honestly made me chuckle.

"What?" He asked with a faint grin. "Aaron is our son, is he not?"

I nodded and then looked at Angie who got onto the bed, sitting at the end of it.

"There's also surrogacy." She spoke, completely in her own thoughts, and I looked at her.

"Surrogacy?" I muttered, wiping at my cheeks.

"Yeah. You know... you pay someone to carry your child." She said. "They will still use your eggs and Fred's sperm, but someone else's uterus will carry it and give birth. Or, if your eggs won't do the work, the surrogate will use her own eggs."

At that, I frowned, my hand squeezing Fred's. I didn't like the idea of him sharing a biological child with someone who wasn't me.

And I didn't like the idea of someone else carrying my child. That meant I wouldn't be able to bond with the baby in the same way during pregnancy. I wanted the whole experience.

I used to think I didn't. I didn't because I was scared, but I do want a baby. I want a baby and I want one because Fred's the father. I want a family with him.