Fighting for our Future {TWD Daryl Dixon}

65: Terrible Ideas

TW: abuse/torture, and smut. Neither are really in much detail, but I thought I should mention it anyway.

"What do you mean he's here?" Daryl asked me. I could hear the worry and anger laced in his tone as he spoke to me. "Ya saw him?"

"Yeah." I nodded my head while answering him. "Hudson tried to tell Negan I was his daughter. He walked into the meeting I was having Negan-"

"Ya met with Negan?" He continued questioning me. His voice was now softening as he pulled me close to him again. He sat me on his lap, and pushed my head into his shoulder. I could feel his hand stroking my hair. "'bout what?"

"I- I was trying to escape. I was trying to find you so we could get out together......" 

"What happened?" 

"I killed some people." I told him while wrapping my arms around his body. "Two with a plate I shattered. One with a knife."

"That's my girl.." He praised me, and I wanted to laugh but didn't. "What did he say to ya? Negan?"

"Gave me options. None of them are good." I stated.

"And they were?" 

"Jesus, what are we playing twenty questions here?" I retorted. "What about what they've done to you? What happened to you?"

"Nothin'." He told me while grunting. "Just shoved me in here and annoyed the hell out of me with this damn song on repeat." I then heard him growl at me. "Now answer my damn questions. Ya were pushed in here, naked. What the hell happened!?"

He has every right to be concerned. I would be too If he was shoved into my arms naked and afraid.

"I wasn't naked all day. Just before I got to you." I started explaining. "I woke up this morning finally, and went on a killing spree trying to find you. But Negan found me first. He then made me shower and put on some slutty dress, before he would talk with me. The whole thing felt like an interview..... I guess it kind of was."

"What were the options ya mentioned?"

"Die on a spike." I groaned. "Work for him and wish I was dead, work for him and be treated well, or....." I shutter at the thought of the fourth option. "Become one of his wives."

He was silent for a moment, probably processing what I just said. "What ya choose?"

"I didn't." I shook my head while thinking back to our meeting. "He chose for me. I told him I was done answering his fucking questions. After I saw Hudson, I freaked out. I was so strong before. I stood my ground, but Hudson..... He makes me feel so weak. Powerless. I'm sorry...."

I cried into his shoulder some more as he clung onto me. I have no idea how I'm going to escape this hell. At the prison, Daryl swooped in and saved me. But he can't do that now. Now I have nobody that can save me. I'm literally a dead woman walking.

"Ya ain't got nothin to apologize for." He told me sternly. "I was the reason ya were there in that clearing. This is my fault. Abraham is dead, and you lost yer arm 'cause of me."

"No." I started arguing with him. "Abraham was out there for a different reason, That is not your fault. As for my arm...." I moved my right hand over to feel my stub. "That's my fault. I told Carl to sit back down, I screamed at my father to do it.... It's my fault. Not yours."

His silence was deafening. I know he will always blame himself for this. It doesn't matter how hard I try. Nothing I ever say will get him to see the truth. That it isn't is fault.