Stray Kids POVs (collection)

Honesty - Jeongin (1)

It feels weird. You don't know how to describe it with other words. It just feels weird as you follow your husband – still awkward to call him that – out of the restaurant to the car. Jeongin waits until you are sitting next to him in the car.

"Is it really necessary to meet with them every week?" He asks and sighs deeply, his voice annoyed and tired.

"It was part of the deal between our parents." You answer, feeling the urge to explain to him that it was not your wish to eat this regularly with your and his parents. "They want to see how this works."

He starts the car without even looking at you. "Well, it may would look more realistic for them, when you would stop flinching away every time I lay an arm around you."

You look at him while he is concentrating on the road in front of him. You know what he means, but it feels weird, when he starts to behave like a happy husband as soon as they see you two together. And when you are back home or like this, back in the car, he is the uninterested, reserved guy again. He hates these meetings as much as you do, but it was part of this arranged marriage. And both of your parents like to control over their children.

You're not that good at acting. And you feel overstrained when he starts to act like he would really like you.

You wanted to say that you could get used to his touch, if he would behave less cold with you, but you stop yourself. You don't know what you have done to him, but he acts like this since you both have heard from the plans about the marriage.

"I'll meet with your brother when I've dropped you off at home. You don't need to stay awake and wait or something." Jeongin looks shortly at you, waiting for your response, and you hum understanding.

This means the next lonely evening again. If the situation were different, you would probably all spend it together. Like in the old days. Before this marriage has ruined the relationship between you and your brother as well as the friendship with Jeongin.

It is good that they both are still friends, but you miss the talks with your brother and the usual meetings with him. And the relaxed atmosphere between you and Jeongin. You miss the time before your parents have told you about the plan that they have made months before they have fill you into their plans.

You are still laying on the couch in the living room when you hear the opening front door of the apartment. It is already pretty late, nearly midnight. You have watched a random TV show, something stupid and pointless, Jeongin would usually say. You love to watch these shows, you don't have to think much about what happens there and you can just relax.

Your first instinct is to pretend to be asleep when he steps into the living room. You haven't waited for him, not really. But there is just one bedroom in the apartment with a big bed and you couldn't sleep this evening all alone.

Jeongin mumbles your name, followed by a deep sigh, when you still pretend to sleep. He turns the TV off and carefully covers you with the blanket from the armrest.

It is the next day when you come home from work and suddenly met your brother in your living room.

You stare at him surprised, not expecting him here. He hasn't visited you or Jeongin in your appartement since you two has moved in here after the marriage. He hasn't even talked to you properly since your parents announced the marriage.

You eye him carefully, noticing his way too long hair that urgently needs a new cut. A job you have done for him the past years, but now he refuses to ask you about it. You spot the same curious expression on his face as he inspects you, but it quickly becomes neutral again.

"Hey" You greet him almost timidly, nervous how he will react now.

"Hey" He greets back, his voice more like he greeted a random stranger than his sibling.

He shoves his hands into the pockets of his hoodie, looking around, clearly not interested in talking more with you.

"How are you?" You force yourself to keep speaking, an attempt to rebuild the old relationship. Like every time you meet him, which wasn't too often.

"Great." He answers shortly and sounds now annoyed. You nod and run your fingers through your hair. You think about something other you could ask him to keep the conversation going, but your head is empty. You have tried it a few times and he stay short-sided and rejecting.

"Alright." This is all you say and turn away to go to the kitchen.

"You really don't understand it, right?" He asks and you turn back to him. His face is now completely expressionless, only his eyebrows drawn together.

"What do you mean?" You are surprised by his sudden question and totally clueless about what you don't seem to understand.

"I mean this whole thing." He raises a hand to make an all-encompassing movement. He sighs deeply when you just look at him, still not getting what he is talking about. "This marriage and this apartment and this happy-ever-after-life that you are playing here. You acted so innocent the last months and haven't even-"

"Alright, I'm ready, let us go." Jeongin enters the living room, interrupting your brother. He wears a casual outfit and looks surprised between you two, noticing the awkward atmosphere almost immediately. He walks past you, grabs your brother on his arms and drags him towards the front door.