My venting book + Stories(?)

August 19-23, 2024

Tuesday, I saw a attractive guy in my sociology class and I kept glancing at him only to keep making eye contact with each other. The whole class I was embarrassed and I was texting my friend who happened to be an ex of mine about the situation.

Wednesday, I was texting my friend about the attractive guy in my class, who I'll name Jay. Apparently my friend was friends with Jay and was also texting Jay at the same time so he told Jay everything that I said about him even tho I told him not to and then I found out that Jay also found me attractive. Btw my friend/ex moved to Kansas so he wasn't actually there at all. Anyways my friend was tryna set us up and kept asking me questions and stuff and everything was going well until he asked my age. I'm 14 and turning 15 on August 25th but like I say that I'm 15 to everyone bc it's close enough. Jay however, is 17 and going on 18 and his age limit is 16. This sent me spiraling and I was literally asking my friends if I should lie about my age so he would date me. Like I would just say I'm one year older than what I really am so it wouldn't really be that much of a problem but everyone said no. EXCEPT for one friend and he still wanted me to lie to him until today (Friday).

Friday, So my ex/friend said that Jay would probably say no to dating me anyways for the past couple days because of our ages and I was like, "well maybe I'll be an exception" and being delusional like always. Um anyways then today I took that chance and gave him my number only for him to say "I'm not interested but you seem cool so we don't have to be just strangers" and I was so disappointed. I didn't really care much tho bc this is only the second weeks of school and I've only known him since Monday. But what really disappointed me today was my friends.

I have been telling and asking my friends all week, last week, and even occasionally during the past MONTH that I was gonna have my bday party on August 24th at my house and y'know what they fucking did? THEY FUCKING CANCELED LAST MINUTE AND BASICALLY JUST GAVE A HUGE FUCK YOU TO MY FACE AS A BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Like I've been telling y'all so much and all of a sudden you're busy?! I invited like 10 people and only ONE PERSON IN TOTAL is showing up to my BIRTHDAY PARTY. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUVK GUYS.

I thought y'all liked me but you guys can't even be bothered to show up for like 4 hours just to eat cake and play games? I literally bought and made y'all so many gifts before and now you're ditching me. I get like two of my friends bc they also had family members birthday parties on the 24th but like I've been telling this one friend for basically a whole entire month now about my birthday party and he's like "no I'm busy" WTF. And guess what, that's not even the worst part. Y'know that single friend that is coming tomorrow? She's been my best friend since second grade and still is and we've basically grown up together and have always stuck by each others sides and blah blah blah. Anyways, she forgot my birthday. She literally forgot my birthday was August 25th and that my birthday party with the 24th AKA TOMORROW. So um yeah she's gonna show up to my birthday party without a present and be the only one there while me and my mom planned a few things and literally got like 20 cupcakes with cute Sanrio toppers and the only ones who are gonna enjoy it are my family and my best friend.

I planned SO MUCH for my birthday and it all went out the window because my friends can't make time for me. I get it if they had jobs, or ofc family stuff, but without giving me an excuse or even worse, saying you had homework or some shit like that like bro...I would make time for you guys so why can't you do this one thing for me that's only once a year? Whatever I'm petty and I feel narcissistic right now but like I planned this for months and y'all cancel literally the day before...

Whatever if ANYONE reads this (I know nobody cares anymore there was literally only one person that read my last chapter) um...Can y'all wish me a happy birthday or something? Please...

I don't know...I'm just really sad.