L x Reader oneshots 1 // series 3 • Death Note

Little weirdos

A/n: one of the alters has major baby fever rn so I'm making this because he won't shut up about it lol.

Not one to sleep often, L found himself the one on night shift with this whole baby care thing. It wasn't exactly a... planned event. But he was an adult and could accept the consequences of his own actions, so here he was. A father, something he never considered a possibility until 9 months ago when you told him the little change in any future plans had occurred. At the end of the day, the one carrying the child is the only one who can make the decision to keep it or not. So even though he was admittedly quite scared to face such a massive change, he faced it.

L was also the kind to study a topic to death until he knew absolutely everything about it. So in those 9 months he became all knowledgeable on childcare. Although he'd forgotten the part about each child being different and not every parenting method world necessarily work.

"I don't know what you want kid..." he sighed, looking down at the crying child in his arms.

He'd tried feeding, changing, cooling down, warming up, playing, checking for sickness... this kid just wouldn't stop crying. And he was trying to keep the noise down, you needed sleep. You were the one who birthed the damn thing, you needed the rest more than he did. All he could really do was bounce and rock, hoping it'd eventually soothe the baby back to sleep.

He paced around, trying to think of a solution like he was analysing a case. He'd ruled out all the common things like hunger, needing to be changed and needing sleep. None had worked. Then he went to the next options, temperature, light level, comfort items... still no change. He'd come to the point of this 'case' where he had to start thinking outside the box. Clearly the child wanted something very specific...

Stimulation? Like a baby sensory video? Maybe music? A lullaby? He was stumped.

"Don't wake up your life giver kiddo, they need the rest. Come on, shhhh... calm down..." He muttered, trying to soothe the child as best he could.

He was getting stressed out here... he needed a drink. Tea, something soothing... swaddling the baby up into a sling to keep them close and free his hands, he went into the kitchen, hoping maybe the movement of being carried around would work. He'd heard some babies sleep better in motion, like being driven around in a car, pushed in a pram, rocked in a rocker. Maybe being walked around would help?

Boiling some water and picking out the tea flavour of the night, he mixed it into a mug and of course, needed the sugar. He was forever a sweet addict at heart. Mixing it in, the spoon clinked against the sides of the mug... and the baby stopped crying.

"Finally" he muttered.

But as soon as he stopped mixing, the baby began to cry again.

"Wh- there's no way..."

He moved the spoon again, and just like that, no crying. This child had listened to him make tea so often in its year of life, it'd grown to find the clinking of a spoon against the mug calming.

"Oh my gods... you really are my child" L sighed, slightly amused.

The baby looked up at him with big wet eyes, then down at the mug watching the spoon go round.

"You can't have this, it's too hot for you" L told them, even if they were too little to understand those words yet.

He tapped the spoon against the rim of the mug, baby wriggling in the sling and laughing at the noise.

"I cannot believe this, THAT is what you're crying about? Ceramic on metal noises? Maybe you got my autism..." L sighed.

Well... if it got the child to be quiet...

He wasn't about to let a baby touch hot tea, but a clean mug and spoon would apparently be tonight's toy. Which is how L needed you sitting on the floor watching over his child tap a spoon against a mug, laughing hysterically at the noise it made. With each clink, L felt more and more dumbfounded that THIS was what all the fuss was over.

"You wake up crying, not because you're hungry or cold... because you want to make clinking noises? Unbelievable, I'm never letting you live this down. When you're 21 I'm bringing this up at your birthday" L told the child.

The baby looked up at him, gummy smile and flapping hands. Yeah... they were probably autistic. Well, at least you'd all know where they got it from.

"Even I wasn't this strange as a child, but I am strange now... so I guess it's in the genes" L chuckled.

The noise had finally woken you up, not the crying but the clinking. Confused at what the hell was going on down there, you dragged yourself out of bed and down the stairs. Only to be met with even more confusion when you actually saw what was going on.

L looked up, seeing you appear at the foot of the stairs and have you an apologetic look.

"This was the only thing that would stop the crying..." he sighed.

"A... mug?" You questioned.

"The sound of a spoon on the mug..."

"...wow"

"I know"

Completely unaware of the situation, your baby simply put the spoon in the mug, and shook it so it hit the sides, making the noise they loved so much apparently. Laughing in joy each time the clinking rang out into the room.

"Blame my genes, of course a child of mine is a little weirdo..." L said.

"Not surprised... although I love my little weirdos" you replied, shaking your head with an amused smile.

"I think an autism assessment is in the future..."

"Yeah probably. Given the lack of babbling yet, weird food habits... this..."

Whatever the reason for this strange behaviour, you'd both love your baby anyway. Even if you'd not be getting any sleep because of clinking mugs, it was so blatantly clear that was L's weird little child.

But then again, you were a little weird too weren't you? Looks like you'd made a little family of strange and usual little weirdos. But honestly? You'd not have it any other way.