With You Again

~*Chapter 18*~

Izzy's POV

After 19 hours on the plane, which is Chris' private plane, we were finally back in LA. As we drove back home, I started to think of that dance Ryan and I had yesterday. He called me beautiful, and he meant it. Whenever he stared into my eyes, I exploded inside. But when he admitted that he missed how close we used to be, it looked like he wanted that to happen again, well for me it was. Not really sure if I was correct but.. it was weird. I felt the same way too.. but it just can't. He has a girlfriend now, maybe he's going to propose to her soon. I guess I was too late.. to give him one more chance. I still love him, that's why. I have so many conflicting feelings that is just impossible to decode.

Sometimes I wonder if wanting to get back together will fade or if the feeling means we were never meant to breakup in the first place. I had a reason though. He cheated on me, resulting our breakup. I didn't know anything else, he just.. cheated on me. Those missed calls, missed texts, even emails he sent me was to say he was sorry. I didn't want to read them before, back when we were together, so I deleted them all. 5 years later.. I have forgiven him. Ever since then, the subject of our breakup hasn't been brought up anymore. As if it was forgotten by us. As if it never existed and we were just normal people, who are starting to fall in love again. Well, I'm falling for him again. Sometimes I ask myself, why. Out of all the guys I have encountered with in Showbiz, why him? We will never know.

I checked my watch, it was 1 AM. I couldn't sleep. I was here, lying on my bed, thinking about him.. thinking about us. I decided to go downstairs to the kitchen. Nobody else was here, it was just me. Bri, Theia and Adam decided to go out without me. How evil. Once I reached the kitchen, I opened the fridge for something to eat. I found some uncooked Churros. I brought out the deep-fryer, placed some olive oil in it because I wanna be healthy and popped the churros in. After what seemed to be 5 minutes the churros were done and golden brown. I got some sugar and cinnamon mixed together and just rolled the churros in there.

Until now, the thought hasn't left my head yet. I took a bite out of my churro as I scrolled down my contacts. I started to call mom.

"Oh hey, honey." She spoke on the other line. "It's 1AM, you should sleep." she scolded.

"I-I can't get something off my head." I stuttered.

"Hm.. Oooh is it about boys?" She snickered.

How should I say this.. you know what I don't know anymore. "Uh.. yeah I guess.."

She snickered even more. "Did you meet some hot celebrity? Oohh I wanna meet him!"

I tried holding my laughter. "No mom. What the barnacles are you talking about?"

"Can I ask a question?" I asked her. She simply replied with "sure".

I took a deep breath. Mom and I never talked about a topic like this before. It was weird whenever she brought up the topic about love and boys back when I was younger. Now that I'm 23, I guess things will be different now. Duh, it already is.

"Have you and dad.. broke up before back when.. you guys were dating.. ?" I spoke nervously as I held the phone on my shoulder, getting myself some hot chocolate.

After some time, she finally replied. "Oh sorry late reply, I was getting some cookies." she paused. "Well, yes. But then we slowly realized, we were made for each other."

I sat down on the counter stool, ready to listen to this story.

"It was back in the late 80's. Your father and I got into a fight. My parents..they were rich. I wasn't allowed to date him because of his social status. They forced me to separate with him. So on one winter day in a park in Boston, I asked him to go to the park and I told him that we were over. He was angry, scared, and sad. He couldn't imagine a life without me. After months, he couldn't take it anymore and so did I. My parents or your grandparents didn't like it when I was depressed, so they let me go. They gave me the permission to live my life my way. So we went back to the same park in Boston. At first, I was about to cry. Then your father did a bold move. He went in to kiss me. From then on, we loved eachother more and more each day. Then we got married."