Judge Me Not

The Death Touch (rainbowofponies)

Title: The Death Touch

Author: Nami761

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Romance and Vampires

Blurb: Sixteen year old Christy Sanders is raped, when she tries to get the justice she deserves everything turns upside down. Her friends and family turns against her, she is sent to live with her aunt in North Carolina, where she attends a boarding school. There she makes good friends and is faced with the possibiliy that her boyfriend is a blood thirsty vampire who is turned evil with an obsession to destroy her due to his soul taken away, and just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, someone is harming the students at Wellington Boarding School. As she struggles to find out the masked villain behind this catastrophe and stops at nothing to save her hot souless vampire boyfriend with the help of her best friend and roommate they set out to kick ass for the one responsible for their beloved Damien.

Review:

I liked the start of your story, because it goes straight to the main plot (of what happened to Christy).  However, maybe it did fast forward too much, because the info was already dumped on us just on the first paragraphs of the first chapter. Everything that happened to her, her family, her friend, and what happens to her in school was said. It'll help in your future chapters that you try to take it slow, and offer information bit by bit as your story progresses.

Also for me, your plot moves in a really fast pace, and we're swayed along with it, and not much insight on what the character's reaction to what's happening to her. It's because you switch the settings/ happening quickly I didn't get to understand much of the situations.

Christy and Damien has the instant-love going on with them. I didn't quite process how and why they got together, and I can only reason that it was the attraction/ chemistry between them. It happened too fast and too quickly for my taste. Don't worry though, you don't have to change that and instead you could maybe show how deep their bond is in the future chapters. :)

Christy was your typical abused teen we see in other stories, but she's strong and knows what to do to save the people she loves, which is a good quality. The vampire element was there, but not much touched besides Damien being one. 

Proofreading would be a good idea since there are some spelling mistakes, and maybe limit the spaces? Some have little or too big gaps here and there, because it confuses the reader sometimes.

Overall, it's a nice story for vampire lovers and romance readers alike :)

Coleen/rainbowofponies ;)