Chapter 1

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Connor P.O.V

Popular what really does that mean? I wouldn't know. I'm never labeled.
that. I'm labeled the geek. The weird one. Maybe that's why I get picked on all the time. Is it my fashion? Is it the way I speak? Or is it just...... me?
I wouldn't know. Maybe you should ask my school time bullies. I wish I was popular having people go crazy over me like him. Him. Troye Sivan Mellet the king of the school with his little side bitches. Tyler Oakley and Zoe Sugg. They are branded the popular ones. Jocks they are another threat to my kind. Wait what am I kidding I'm a damn loner. My kind Connor you're so funny thinking that. Joe Sugg, Marcus Butler, and the oh so scary Mark Ferris. They threaten me if I even look their way. The preps. Bethany Motta, Hanna Hart, and her best friend Mamrie Hart. They are always the one to get the guys? Why can't I be the one who gets the guys? Or girls? Wait I don't know what I want do I like girls? Or do I want a guy? Not even my sister Nicola understands. I just wish someone would listen to me. Teachers always say that they take no bullying in schools but, that's the first lie they always tell you when you move to a new school. Popular sounds good right now.

I lean up from my pillow to touch my sleeves and realize how bad my arms really look. I lay back down and start to feel the same pain I do everytime I wake up to go to hell or as some people call it SCHOOL.

"Connor you're going to be late!" My mom yells from downstairs I hear the door close and know she left. "Like it would bother me to be late." I mumble out to myself. I get up and look in the mirror. "Some things never change." I say into the mirror seeing the bags under my eyes. The never ending dark circles. They seem like they will never leave my face. I walk to my wardrobe and look for something to wear. I grab my black jeans. Ripped at the knees. I grab a t-shirt. Something I would never ever wear at school just like that. No one knows about my little stupid thing I do to myself. For 3 years it's been going on and no one cares to notice.

I grab my sweater I wear almost everyday. I throw it over my head and I close my eyes and think. 4 more days Connor 4 more until the weekend . I open my eyes and grab my school bag. Throwing it over my shoulder. Walking past the mirror again I back track to a hat. Knowing that it won't look bad with a hat.

Lies! The screaming comes through my ears. I have been telling myself to block it out. It doesn't work anymore. I stumble to my door and open it up to find my sister standing just outside her door.

"Connor. How are you?" Nicola asks. I just want to laugh and yell bad! I just smile the fakest one I can pull off. "Fine you?" I ask to change the subject. That's all I am now a days. Fine. Fine FINE! I lie to keep people around me happy. "Good mom left already." Nicola says I nod. She always is gone. Dad is never here. My siblings have a social life. Our family just doesn't talk to each other anymore the Franta family is falling apart.

"My friend is going to drive me to school today." Nicola says grabbing an apple. I nod wishing I had something like that. "Alright have fun." I say and she walks out of the house. I look at the other apple on the table. 5 days since I stomached some food. I'm slowly dying and honestly I'm fine with that. Dying is the best thing on my mind right now. I hear a car pull up and some yelling. Nicola is now gone. I slip my platform shoes on and put my hood up, music up, blocking out the world. That's all I do. Block out the bad things.

Stop lying! Stop telling me what to do! I shake my head and see the bus coming down the road I run to the stop and get on the bus. I sit near the front and dread the day to come ahead.

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