Torn Between Two

Chapter 48

Connor

The bus ride was interesting. I had a close eye on Tyler. He kept looking at Troye and the new kid. I know Tyler wants to make him into something bad. Troye and I won't let that happen. I didn't really speak. I just kept my eyes on Troye the whole time while he spoke. "Troye he is looking at you weird." Jamie says and points my way. Troye turns his head. I know he wants to ask why. Not in front of Jamie though. He won't do that. "He does that sometimes. I guess he just gets lost in thought of how pretty I am." Troye says. I smile then hit his arm. "Oh shush." I say and then put my legs up on the back of the seat and pull out my phone. "Awee don't be Mr. Pouty. I love you." Troye says and then kisses my face but, all I feel is a lot of spit on my face. "Troyeeeeee." I say and wipe my face. "Connorrrrr." Troye says and then turns back towards Jamie. "You two are super cute. How long have you been together?" Jamie asks. "3 months and a bit." Troye says. He takes my hand while I put my head on his shoulder. "Wow okay. I thought it would be longer. I was going to say I have no chance with any of you." Jamie says. We both stop. "Your gay?" I ask. "Yeah I am." Jamie says. "Well sorry no chance with you getting with him. He is mine." Troye says and then kisses my temple. "No don't worry I wouldn't do that to both of you." Jamie says. We both nod. The bus stops and people get on. "Who are those people? Preps and jocks?" Jamie asks. "Preps they are not as bad but, they still can just take something and spread it around the school." Troye says. "Yeah they sure can." I say. "I used to be friends with them. Was the worst time of my life." Troye mumbles I kiss his hand. Letting him know not to make a big deal out of it. "What classes do you have next semester?" Jamie asks. "Well for me." Troye starts to say. "I have music/vocal, something I really love. I have English, drama, and video editing course." Troye says. "I have music/vocal, English, drama and cooking class." I say. He nods. "I know I have music. I play a good guitar. I also have English. No drama but cooking class." Jamie says. We both nod. "Well you ready for a day of High School here?" Troye asks. "Yeah I sure am." Jamie says. I grab my bag and Troye grabs my hand while we walk off the bus. I keep close to him. Not wanting for him to let go. I feel a slap on the back. "Hey loser. See you got a new friend." Tyler says. "Screw off." I say and then he looks at me. "I would rather screw Troye but, whatever you have fun doing your whore ways." Tyler says and skips off with Zoe right behind him. Troye pulls me in for a hug. "Don't listen to him." Troye whispers to me. "I know." I say and then I see Jamie looking at us. "That is Tyler Oakley?" Jamie asks. "Yeah. He is so rude. He bullies people and wants to go after my boyfriend." I say and he nods. "Okay I will never go near him." Jamie says. We walk in and we take him right to the office. "Hello Mr. Handt, Mr. Mellet, Mr. Franta. What can I do for you?" The girl at the front desk asks. "Well we are just wondering Jamie's locker number?" Troye asks. She gets up. "It is close to Connor's locker." She says and gives us the number. We walk out of the office. "So this is." Troye starts to explain as we head around the school. "This is a boys bathroom." Troye says. I look up and realize that is what I was forced into doing things. "Umm I have to go." I say and Troye looks at me. "Babe why?" Troye asks. "Umm I have to do something." I say I turn around and a hand grabs me. "No I don't want you to be alone okay? I will keep you in sight at all times." Troye says. He is right something could happen to me if I am alone. "Okay fine." I say and keep quiet. "This is the bathroom things happened in." I whisper to Troye. He looks at me. "Oh okay we will be moving on." Troye says to Jamie. Troye walks in front. With my hand in his. Pulling me along the school. I see everyone looking at me. I know this is normal but, why is it getting to me right now? I shouldn't let it be. Should I talk to Troye? No he is busy. He won't care. Troye pulls me and I realize I am at my locker. "This is Connor's locker and you are 3 down." Troye says. I open my locker and he throws all his stuff in his locker. I lean up against the door. Troye leaves and helps Jamie do things. I keep my eyes closed on the door. I put my hands on the side of the door and hit my head against the locker door. Troye not noticing about me. I hit my head harder. He is falling for Jamie. He doesn't care for you Connor let him go with Jamie so you can cut. You already promised Troye you wouldn't this way you can. "Get out of my head." I mumble to myself. I can't Connor I am you I told you this. You are ugly, fat, useless peice of shit that should die in a hole! "Leave me alone!" I yell slamming my door shut. Troye looks over. Jamie does as well. Then everyone around me looks at me. I close my locker and slowly walk away. I hear Troye calling my name out. Then Jamie calling my name out. "Connor what?" Jamie asks. Then Troye reaches me. Without a word he hugs me. "I know just breathe." Troye whispers to me. "Don't listen to them." Troye says rocking me back and forth. He doesn't care. He doesn't love you. He hates you! Leave him! Die! "Leave me alone please." I whimper into Troye's chest. I start to shake. I know I need to breathe. "Focus on my voice." Troye says. "Troye what is wrong with him?" Jamie says. "Can you get him a drink of water. Go in my bag there is a water bottle. He just has these moments." Troye explains to him. I know he won't tell him. I won't even tell him. "Okay." Jamie says. I put my head on his shirt and hold his sweater tighter. "Breathe. Whatever they are saying don't listen to them. They are wrong. I love you. You are hot, beautiful, don't leave me." Troye says to me. I know I won't leave him. I need him. I love him. I know they are wrong. I know the voices are wrong. "Here you go." Jamie says and hands it to Troye. Troye brings me over to a wall and I sit down. I take a sip of water.